“Sam, do you know they lose money on their rotisserie chicken?”
“Here we go.” I rub my temples as he goes on about all the deals he saw today.
“I’m just saying, until you try their slippers you haven’t lived.”
“As often as you go, I’m surprised you don’t have more food at your house.”
He sighs and changes the channel. “Where do you think most of your stuff comes from?”
“Bro, you really need to get laid.”
He pauses his search on the TV and turns his surprised gaze on me. “Look who's talking.”
“I have an excuse. I'm busy.” Just then my phone rings and gives me a way out of this conversation.
Sure, it’s been a while since I’ve had sex. Okay, maybe it’s been longer than a while. Like years. But it’s true what I told Asher. I’ve been busy building my business and making sure that the family I hope to one day have will be financially secure. That’s what I told myself all this time. That eventually my hard work would pay off and then I could settle down. But what if I’ve waited too long and now my chance to have a wife and babies has passed me by?
Instead of dwelling on that and sinking further into my own misery, I answer my phone.
“Samuel here.”
“Hi Samuel, it’s Ramona from Human Resources.”
“Hey, Ramona, is everything okay?” It’s not normal that I get a call from HR after hours.
“Yes, I just wanted to let you know that I had the mail room implement your request to forward everything to your house. We had a notification that you received a package today, and I wanted to follow up and make sure the work order was completed.”
“Oh yeah.” I glance back to the coffee table and see the box I kicked earlier sitting there. “It’s here.”
“Great. I’m going to close the work order as completed. Everything should forward to your home address from here on out. So anything addressed to you at the company will come to your home.”
“Perfect, thanks for following up.”
“No problem at all. Have a good night.”
“You too,” I say before we end the call.
Some people might be questioning why I’m getting all my ducks in a row, but I was serious about what I told Asher earlier. I’m close to getting out, and when I do, I want that transition as smooth as possible. Which means separating my personal stuff from the business. It will be bittersweet to step back, but it’s the right choice.
Putting my phone on the table, I reach for the box and begin opening it. Asher says something about the game he put on, and I’m watching the screen as I tear open the tape. Without really paying attention, I reach inside and grab something big and plastic.
“What the?” My eyes widen when I see what I’ve pulled out of the box.
“Dude, I know it’s been a while, but that seems a little extreme,” Asher says as he begins to laugh.
“It’s not mine.” I’m looking at the vibrator that’s shaped like a cock with a little rabbit spur on it that I’m guessing is for tickling a woman’s clit.
“Hey, no judgment, brother.” Asher shrugs as he goes back to watching TV. That’s him in a nutshell. Absolutely zero surprise that I just pulled out a dildo in front of him.
It’s strange because the more I look at it, the more I wonder what it would feel like to use it on a woman. Fuck, it’s been so long, I’m imagining me putting a dildo in a woman instead of my cock.
“I’ve always considered these teammates more than an enemy,” I say as I turn the package over. “But right now, I’m jealous this was meant to get fucked tonight.”
“You and me both,” Asher grunts.
Picking the box up off the floor, I look at the front and see the address is correct. It was sent to my corporate office, but instead of my name, I see Parker Louis typed out on the label.
“Parker Louis?” I say out loud, with a sneaking suspicion that I know that name.
“Louis?” Asher repeats. “Is that the guy you recruited a couple of years ago?”
“Yeah,” I say slowly as the gears in my brain begin to turn. “And his daughter, Parker, is one of my new interns.”
“Oh, shit.” Asher begins laughing. “She sent her new boss a dildo?” His laughter grows, and I feel myself smiling too.
“I’m not sure why, but I think it’s only polite to return it to its owner.”