“Something like that.”
“I think we can forgive ourselves for our mutual attraction.”
“You can forgive yourself because you didn’t know about the relationship. I did.” He’d said they weren’t going to discuss this, but they were. He made an impatient gesture. “Jeremy was a minor obstacle compared with the other one.”
“Your bloodline.”
“Which is poison.”
“Hmm.” She pursed her lips thoughtfully. “I suppose I’ll have to throw the boys back, too.”
“What?”
“Well, they’re your blood relatives, remember? Doesn’t that make them just as toxic as you? If I reject you because of that taint, then it only follows—”
“Stop being ridiculous.”
“You took the words right out of my mouth.”
She stood up, rounded the coffee table, and came to kneel in front of his chair. He tried to stand up, but she angrily pushed him back into the seat. “I’m going to have my say. Then you can do what you want, but I’m not going to let you sail out of my life and forever regret that I didn’t say this and wonder what would have happened if I had.”
She placed her hands on his chest as though to impress upon him her earnestness. “For months during and after my marriage, I couldn’t even fathom myself being in another relationship. Ever. I couldn’t imagine a man’s—any man’s—touch being something I would invite. I couldn’t see myself ever feeling anything like desire again.
“After some distance from it, when the wounds were no longer fresh and even my sons couldn’t fill a particular loneliness, I began to realize how unrealistic it was to think that I’d live the rest of my life alone. I’m not programmed for a lifetime of abstinence. I’m not talking only about sex but about emotional intimacy. I began to want that again. Need it.
“Gradually, I accepted the probability that one day a man would enter my life and rekindle me, that he and I would share what I’d wanted with Jeremy but hadn’t had. I anticipated his arrival, but was in no particular hurry. I wasn’t going to seek him. I was content to wait and let him find me.
“I didn’t know what he would do professionally, or what his interests would be, the nature of his personality. I didn’t know what he would look like…until I saw you.” She touched his lips, following their shape with the tip of her index finger. “I was afraid of you and absolutely furious at you, but all the while I was railing at you for spying on me, I was thinking, ‘This is him. He’s here. And he’s way more than I dared hope for.’” She gave a self-conscious little shrug. “That’s it. That’s my say.”
He took a strand of her hair between his fingers and rubbed it thoughtfully, for a moment too emotional to speak. Then he said, “No one’s ever talked to me that candidly. About anything, but certainly nothing that personal. And I think you’re incredible.”
“It sounds like there’s a but.”
“No but. An and.” He pulled her to her feet as he stood up. “
You’re incredible and, this time, all clothes come off.”
In the bedroom, he flung back the bedcovering, then turned to her and quickly unbuttoned her blouse and pulled it off. He fumbled behind her back for her bra strap while she hastily undid his shirt buttons. Skin to skin they hugged. Just that. They held each other and savored the closeness, the various sensations, the arousing contrasts of their bodies.
Finally he murmured, “I hope you don’t mind chest hair.”
“Mind?” She rubbed her face in it.
He hadn’t realized biceps could be an erogenous zone until she took a love bite out of his. Reaching behind her, he undid the fastening of her skirt. It dropped to the floor. She unbuttoned his jeans and slid them down along with his underwear past his hips, her hands firm against his ass.
He nudged her middle with his erection and smiled. “I know you’re a lady, but feel free to notice.”
She did considerably more than notice. He stopped her from taking more than the head, but the attention she lavished on it was almost more than he could endure. After several minutes, swearing and praying at the same time, he brought her up to standing and plunged his tongue into her mouth that had treated him to such hot, wet bliss.
They got onto the bed. Lying face-to-face, he lowered his head to her breasts. “Remarkable.”
“What?”
He used his tongue to illustrate their sensitivity. “That first day on the beach—”
She groaned. “I knew you noticed.”
“I knew you knew I’d noticed, but I couldn’t help myself. Each time the breeze kicked up, I went a little crazy with wanting to see them like this.” His lips tugged on her nipple.