Chapter twenty-five
STONE
“What’sgoingonthen?” Mason asks me when we’re at lunch. They haven’t pushed me all weekend, but now that I have to see Ava this afternoon, I’m wired tighter than ever. They’ve clearly noticed.
“Nothing,” I shrug, but I can feel it’s tense.
“Stone, you’re miserable,” Mason says.
“And you nearly knocked Cole’s head off,” Reid adds. “If that wasn’t a clear sign how you feel about her, then nothing will be.” I cringe, remembering what happened that night. I’ve tried to bring it up before, but Reid wasn’t having it, although I guess he’s ready now.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to intrude on you like that.”
“Just on Ava?”
“I can’t help it,” I say as I run my hands through my hair. “She makes me crazy. They’re fucking good at what they do, that’s for sure.”
“They?”
“Stone is having some issues with this situation reminding him of his mother,” Mason reminds him discreetly.
“Oh shit, yeah. I forgot about that.”
“It reminds me of her because it’s the same damn thing.”
“Ava doesn’t seem like that.”
“I don’t know what other evidence you need. She’s literally marrying Lewis to get ahead in business while sleeping around.”
“With you. The other person you assumed she was fucking was busy sucking off our Reidy-boy.” Mason ruffles Reid’s hair like a proud father, but Reid ducks away from him quickly.
“Alright, fucking hell, keep your voice down,” Reid hisses as he throws a punch at Mason’s arm. Mason looks around suddenly.
“Shit, sorry! Is it still a secret?”
“It was never a secret, just private.”
“What is it?”
“Nothing, really. We hook up occasionally. We haven’t in a while because I assumed he was sleeping with Ava, like you did. Nothing to get excited about. Can we stop talking about it now?” Mason holds his hands up to Reid in a relenting gesture.
“Done. Back to your love life,” Mason says as he turns to me. “We’ve all got classes with her this afternoon, how are we playing it?”
“As before. She’s Highland. Open season.” Mason groans while Reid throws his head back, exasperated, and I feel like a fucking asshole, but it’s how it needs it be. It’s how it is.
Easier said than done, though, when it comes to my class with her. I don’t hear one word the lecturer says, my eyes glued to the back of Ava’s head. She doesn’t even glance at me when she comes in, doesn’t acknowledge there’s any other person in the class, let alone me, and I ache to reach out and grab her. To force her to register me, to melt into my touch. This fucking sucks.
Our parents are away again on a business trip, so Ava uses the excuse of no dinner to stay out of the house as much as possible. I know I should be thankful; it’s what I would’ve wanted before I met her, but I really fucking miss her. I miss holding her, seeing her eyes light up when she smiles genuinely. I miss her quick mouth, the sound of her voice, the feel of her curves, the way her mouth pops open when she takes me inside of her. I miss it all, and I didn’t take advantage of the time I had. I knew it wasn’t going to last, and still, I didn’t take enough to sate me. Why can’t I force myself to hate her even though I should? The only way I get through ignoring her for so long is by getting my fix of being close to her while she sleeps.
I try and listen out to hear if Ava comes back, but this house is too big to enable spying. I lay in bed for hours, trying to convince myself it doesn’t matter. She’s clearly not fucking Cole, so who cares where she is? But I do. I care because I want her here with me. Even if we’re not talking, I want her in my vicinity. If that’s the most I can get, then I want it as much as possible.
Throwing the covers back, I pad out of my room and up to hers. Just check if she’s there, that’s all you care about. I slowly open the door and exhale a silent breath at the sight of her curled up in her bed. Okay, there she is, go back to bed now. But of course I don’t. The second I see her there, I need to get my fill. I don’t dare slide in behind her like I want, the thought of her waking up and throwing me out too risky. Taking my old seat in the corner, I soak up her presence like a drug, every muscle in my body slowly relaxing as I watch her sleeping peacefully. It’s starting to get light by the time I manage to drag myself out of there.