“Yeah.” She pulled the strap of her bag higher on her shoulders. “I’ll show you next practice.” Her cell beeped in her hand, and she looked down at it. “My dad is here, I better go.”
I nodded. “See you tomorrow.”
She didn’t reply as she left, and then I was all alone, bar my thoughts. I grabbed my bag out of the locker and pulled out my wash supplies then headed into the showers. There was no way I could put my clothes back on while sweat was still pouring out of me.
I took a quick shower, then wrapped a towel around my body, and sat on one of the benches. My gaze zoned in on the fresh cut on my left thigh, and I couldn’t help but drag the pads of my fingers over all the other scars. Some were bigger than others. Some deeper, some more shallow. Some looked angry, some were delicate, but they all represented the agony I had deep down in my heart.
I didn’t know how long I sat on the bench and stared at them, but it was a knock on the locker room door that had me jumping out of my skin and covering them up.
“Aria?” A pause and then, “Need me to give you a ride home?”
“I…” I cleared my throat to shout louder. “I need a ride to the diner.”
I held on tighter to my towel, afraid he’d come in any second. I knew I needed to tell him what I’d done last night, but I wished I didn’t have to. I was trying to appear strong and confident because I didn’t want to be the weak one—the one everyone walked on eggshells around.
“Sure. I’ll wait out here.”
The idea of him only on the other side of the door had me yanking my underwear and clothes on. My light-blue jeans with rips in the knees covered the scars he knew about, and the dark-purple band T-shirt covered my splintered heart.
Once I pushed my feet into my boots, I grabbed my bag and slung it over my shoulder. Cade was leaning against the wall, and as soon as he saw me, he straightened.
I didn’t say a word to him as we exited the building and he locked up behind us. We walked around the outside of it and into the parking lot. Only his car and a couple more taking up spaces. The lights on the black shiny sports car flashed when we got closer, and I opened up the passenger side door and entered his car.
The clean leather smell calmed me, but my pulse quickened when Cade got in and started the engine. My nerves were going haywire at being in such close quarters with him, but I wasn’t really sure it was because of that. It was the secret I was holding on to. The broken promise.
Cade pulled up to a stoplight, and I could feel the burn of his gaze on the side of my face. We were only a couple of minutes away from the diner now, and I knew I had to tell him before we got there. It was now or neve
r, and—
“I cut last night,” I blurted out. I kept my gaze focused on my hands in my lap, too scared to look up at his face. I wasn’t sure what he was going to say, but his silence was a surprise.
The seconds ticked by, each one feeling longer than the last, and then he stopped the car. I looked up, seeing he’d parked right at the back of the lot of the diner.
“Why didn’t you call me?” his rough voice asked. When I didn’t answer him, he slapped his palm on his steering wheel and repeated, “Why didn’t you call me, Aria?”
“I…I…erm…” I gripped on to my hands so tight my knuckles were turning white.
“Aria.” His hand landed over both of mine, covering them entirely. “Look at me.”
I swallowed and took a deep breath, preparing myself. I glanced up at him and witnessed the torment shadowing his own eyes. “I was scared,” I whispered, hating that my throat was closing up. “I…I hate being this person.” I closed my eyes and leaned the back of my head against my seat as a lump built in my throat. “This isn’t who I was meant to be.”
“Baby.” His hand moved off mine. I heard a click, and then my belt trailed across my body. “Come here.”
I opened up my eyes just in time to see him pushing his seat back, and then he reached for me. I shouldn’t have gone to him. I shouldn’t have let him take my sorrow away, but the draw to him was too much to deny.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered and swiped away a tear from my face. His hands gripped my waist as he pulled me over the center console and into his lap. The safety of his arms couldn’t be denied, and I burrowed into his chest, letting him hold me.
“Don’t be,” he murmured and planted a kiss on the top of my head. “You told me. That’s all that matters.”
I nodded, but I wasn’t sure I agreed with him. I hated being the person I was. I itched to get out of my own skin. “It was just…it’s…” I felt like I needed to explain it to him. Maybe if he understood why, it would be easier. But that was the problem. No one would ever understand why I was the way I was. I’d seen things I shouldn’t have. I’d witnessed stuff not many people ever would. And this…this was the only way I could cope.
“You don’t need to say anything.” Cade maneuvered me away from him a little. His face was level with mine as he swiped away the trailing tears. “All I asked was that you came to me, and you did.” He moved his face closer, the green flecks in his blue eyes shining bright. “That was all I asked of you.”
“You don’t want to shout at me?” I asked, feeling so much like the insecure girl I knew I was deep down.
“No, baby.” His lips curved into a grin. “I don’t want to shout at you.” He flicked his gaze down to my lips and then whispered his against mine in a gentle caress. My breath caught in my throat, and I pressed down harder. It had been too long since his last touch.
My cell rang out from my bag, but I ignored it as I pushed my hand through his hair and held him in place. I needed this. I needed him. More than he would ever know.