“Wow. I thought you’d—”
“Be one of the kids at school who worked for nothing?” he finished for me, and I nodded in agreement. I’d never met another kid at our high school who worked, so Leo went way up in my estimations
. “Nah. My parents made me get a job when I was thirteen because I kept asking for computer games.” He leaned down and glanced around as if to check no one could hear him. “Now, I can buy my own, which means they have no say over what I’m buying.” He paused, and I had no idea what he was trying to say. My face must have said as much because he huffed and rolled his eyes. “Over-eighteen games. I’m only fourteen.”
“Oh!” My eyes widened. “I get it.” I slapped the palm of my hand to my forehead. “Sorry. I’m miles away.” I didn’t know why I’d told Leo that. We were partners in French class, but we weren’t friends. A girl like me didn’t get to have real friends, not ones who wouldn’t judge her anyway.
“You okay?” Leo asked, and I nodded as Jan placed a glass of orange soda down on the table in front of me. She smiled at me and then Leo, patting him on the shoulder as she walked away.
“Yeah, I’m good.” I smiled. The same smile I’d perfected when I was a little girl, which outwardly said I’m okay while inside I was anything but. I knew I wasn’t okay. It wasn’t like I was trying to fool myself. Everything was falling apart around me. My job was draining me, my dancing was stressful with the competition coming up in a few days, and my home wasn’t a home. I’d come back from work last night to a trailer full of people, and two of them had crashed in my bedroom—a place which was meant to be only mine.
I felt like I was a lone leaf drifting on the wind, not knowing which tree was my true home. But it wasn’t until that exact moment I wondered whether I could even find a home. Was there something waiting for me out there? Or did I have to create it myself? Was I fooling myself into thinking things would get better with my mom? I was eighteen, I could leave at any moment, but something always kept me there. I was tethered, not knowing how to untie myself.
“Elodie?” Leo asked, and I gasped.
“Sorry.” I chuckled, trying to make it seem like nothing, but I was starting to realize Leo saw through the bullshit. He was only fourteen, but there was an earthiness to him. He wasn’t like the other kids, and maybe that was why he didn’t fit in. But I didn’t fit in either. We were two people who didn’t conform to the norm, and it was then I realized I’d never had a real friend. Never had someone I could confide in about the shit in my life.
“What you doing after work?” I asked him, not thinking twice about the words coming out of my mouth.
Leo’s eyes widened. “I…erm…going home?”
“Wanna hang out?”
Leo shuffled from one foot to the other. “I gotta go to the store for my mom first,” he said, his voice low.
“I can take you to the store.” I grinned as Jan walked toward us with a plate of food and a slice of cheesecake. “When do you finish?”
I blinked at Leo as he looked over at the wall where a giant clock was. “In fifteen minutes.”
I picked my fork up off the table and said, “Thanks,” to Jan, then turned to Leo. “Meet me outside after your shift?”
He stepped back and hesitated. “You sure?”
My honest answer was that I wasn’t sure. I didn’t really know what I was doing, apart from listening to my gut. I’d spent so many years surviving and doing what I thought I needed to, but I’d never simply stepped back and done what I wanted to. Did I want to work? No, but I had to. Did I want to live in a trailer with a drug-addicted mom? Hell to the no. But I didn’t have a choice when it came to them. But friends? I had a choice with friends, and at that moment, I knew I wanted Leo to be my friend. I felt like a six-year-old schoolgirl who had made her first real friend, and the butterflies swarmed in my stomach at the thought.
“Yeah, Leo. I’m sure.”
“What about Knox and—”
“What about him?” I raised a brow and picked the burger up off my plate. “I’m not asking you to be my boyfriend, Leo. I’m offering my friendship, but if you—”
“I’ll meet you outside,” he cut me off, a huge smile on his face. And for the first time in what felt like years, I felt somewhat comfortable in my own skin.
I’d wanted to escape the trailer, and I’d managed to do that, but I had no idea what I would do after I’d eaten. But now I had a plan. One where I wasn’t using someone simply to pass the time or because it would mean a free meal or extra tips. I wanted a real friendship, and for the first time, I was willing to take the chance.
I wasn’t sure why Leo made me feel like it was okay to do it, but there was something about him that felt safe. Like he wouldn’t take things too far. Like he’d care if I got hurt. Like if he knew about my situation, all he’d want to do was help. He was the kind of friend I needed, even though I’d never confide in him about what happened in private. Those things weren’t for anyone else to see or hear. That was my own personal pain. A pain I’d never expose. But I could do the other stuff. I could hang with him and talk shit, and maybe he’d even help me understand French so I didn’t fail the goddamn class.
“Ready,” Leo announced as I was shoving the last couple of fries in my mouth. His clothes were different. Gone was his shirt and name tag, and in its place a T-shirt with some kind of game slogan written on the front. I had no idea what it meant, and I didn’t have the desire to find out.
“Great.” I took the last swig of my orange soda, threw my money on the table, and stood. Leo may have been four years younger than me, but he still managed to tower over me. And from the way he walked and reached to open the door, he’d had his growth spurt not long ago because he still didn’t know how to maneuver his limbs.
The silence stretched between us as we walked to my car, and I heard him whispering something under his breath. I didn’t quite catch everything, but I heard “be cool” several times. I wanted to laugh at him chanting to himself, but I didn’t want to make him feel uncomfortable—not this early into our friendship anyway.
I pushed my key into the lock on the driver’s door and waited for him to try and open the passenger door. When it wouldn’t open, and he looked up, I told him, “Chill.” He blinked several times. “I’m not going to murder you, Leo. I’m not going to take you to one of those godawful school parties.” I paused and waited until his shoulders pulled down. “I thought you seemed pretty cool and might wanna hang out.” I was acting as if it didn’t matter if he decided to turn around and not hang out, but the reality was, it kind of did matter.
“Sorry.” He blew out a breath. “I’ve never had a real friend before. Everyone kind of hates me for being smart.”
I pushed inside the car and waited for him to get inside too. “That fuckin’ sucks,” I told him, turning the engine on.