“You can take your time.” She tilted her head to the side. “As long as it takes you.”
I pulled in a deep breath and winced from the pain in my chest. I wasn’t sure whether it was physical or mental, but I knew something wasn’t right. Counting to ten didn’t work, and neither did pretending Asher was right beside me. I was scared I’d never get out of this apartment. The apartment which was now full of bad memories. No. Bad wasn’t the right word. Awful. Catastrophic. Unforgettable. Those were the right words to describe what this apartment was now.
My heart hammered in my chest as I slowly moved onto my knees, and I choked on a sob when I looked down and saw smeared blood on my inner thighs. “I…I can’t.” I shook my head and squeezed my eyes closed. I was afraid I’d fall apart, and I knew if I did, I’d never be able to put myself back together again. I’d been through so much, but nothing—nothing—compared to this.
“Let me help you,” I heard Jenette say, and all I could do was nod. I couldn’t open my eyes because I was petrified what else I would see. “I’m going to take hold of your hands and help you into a standing position, okay?”
I bit down on my bottom lip and just about managed to give her a small nod. I shivered as her palm met mine, and every fiber of my being wanted to snap my hand away from hers, but she was trying to help me. She was trying to get me out of this apartment, and that was exactly what I wanted.
“That’s it, Elodie.” She pulled on my hands and my muscles finally came to life. I swayed right and left as I stood on shaky feet, but I was no longer on the floor. I could run away from her, from this, from what had happened. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t pretend it didn’t happen. I couldn’t go the rest of my life running from Knox.
“I’m going to pull your jeans up now.”
I held my breath as she pulled them over my hips, and my hands whipped out to stop her. “I…I can do it now,” I murmured, but I still didn’t open my eyes. I kept them squeezed shut as I fiddled for the button and zip, then did them up. My head pounded with each little move I made, but it was nothing compared to the stinging between my legs.
“Let’s get you out of here and to the hospital, yeah?” Jenette said.
I took another breath, trying to prepare myself. “Okay.”
“Want me to lead you out?”
I shook my head and slowly opened my eyes, trying not to concentrate on anything in the apartment. But it was no use because my gaze slid right to the floor where Knox had held me down, where he’d taken what he wanted and not cared about the pain he’d caused in the process. He’d said he was trying to teach me a lesson, and I wasn’t sure whether he’d achieved what he wanted to or not, but I knew I’d never be the same again.
Tears flowed down my cheeks and dripped off my chin as I stood frozen to the spot, almost able to see the shadow of what Knox had done. Stains littered the rug, and from the dark color, I could tell it was blood. My blood. His blood. Asher’s blood.
“Elodie?” I looked at Jenette out of the corner of my eyes, not able to give her my full attention. “Are you ready?”
Was I ready? I had no idea, but what I did know was I could never step foot in here again. It was meant to be my safe place. The home I’d never had. Knox hadn’t just ripped away the last piece of me.
He’d stolen all of this too.
ASHER
I didn’t take my gaze off the back of the ambulance as the paramedics loaded the fucker into the back. He started to stir as they pushed him inside, and I yanked on my cuffed wrists causing the metal to dig into my flesh, wishing I could get to him. But reality was that I couldn’t. I was sitting in the back of a police car going nowhere but county jail.
Fuck.
I should have been able to curb my temper. I should have been able to pull him off and then help Elodie. But I hadn’t. I’d lost it. Lost every ounce of rational thinking. But I wouldn’t regret it. I would never be sorry for what I did to that piece of shit. He deserved it, and much more.
The front door of the car opened, and two officers slipped inside. A metal grid sat between the front and back seats to protect them, and I wanted to laugh at the absurdity of it. I wasn’t a dangerous person. Well, not unless you hurt the people I cared most about and then all bets were off. I was the protector, the Marine who had fought for his country and took pride in doing so. Now I was nothing but a criminal in their eyes. I gritted my teeth as I stared at the back of their heads, and although I didn’t want to hear what they were talking about, I couldn’t help it in the small, confined space.
“Jenette’s getting the girl out to take her over to med,” one of them said, and I shuffled forward at his words.
“We gotta wait, then?” the second officer who was in the driver’s seat huffed out.
“Nah. The other unit is here now. They’re gonna take pics of the scene.”
I didn’t want to leave. I didn’t want to go yet. I needed to see Elodie. I needed to make sure she was okay. I needed—fuck! I couldn’t do a damn thing now that I was inside this car, and I felt as helpless as I did the day we lost four members of our team. I hadn’t been able to save them either. And now…now Elodie was going to have to handle this alone because I’d been too damn stupid to keep my cool.
I bounced my leg up and down, needing them to move faster. If they wanted to leave, then why the hell hadn’t we already? I’d never been arrested before, but I knew as soon as I was booked, I’d get a phone call. A phone call I had every intention of using. But first, I had to get to the goddamn jail, and these two were dragging ass, thinking we had all the time in the world, but I didn’t—Elodie didn’t.
Finally, they started the car and I let out a breath of relief. I turned my head to keep my attention on the store as long as possible, but there was no movement by the time we got to the corner, and then we were out of sight and there was nothing else I could do but wait. I was leaving Elodie behind, and my stomach bottomed out at the thought. I’d promised her she’d be safe. I’d made sure she knew she could rely on me. But none of it mattered now. I should have walked her inside—I always walked her inside. Fuck. Why the hell didn’t I walk her inside?
“Hey! Keep it down back there,” one of the officers spat at me, and I wanted to throw my words back at him and kick up a fuss, but I knew it wouldn’t help. All they saw was a man they hadn’t been able to control inside that apartment. They didn’t know who I was and the things I stood for. I could have told them everything. Told them how I’d come back to find my store broken into and that piece of shit on top of Elodie. But I didn’t, because they didn’t need to know. My dad may have worked for the good side, but even he had warned
me about talking to beat cops. I knew what I needed to do and what I had to wait for, but until then, I had to stay silent.
They pulled up around the back of the county jail and drove right up to a metal door. My heart beat out of my chest, but I exuded calm. Show one thing and feel another. It was a talent I’d learned in the Marines, and one which would come in useful now.