“I love you too,” I croaked out, placing a soft kiss against his lips. “I love you so much.”
He pressed his forehead against mine, and for a moment, we sat there, connected in ways nobody could comprehend. Physically. Emotionally. Spiritually. And I knew that I could live the rest of my life only hearing those words from him once, but I hoped he’d say them to me every day.
Chapter Fourteen
FORD
I blinked my eyes open and slammed them shut again as I came face to face with the bright sun as it shone through the window. I rolled over and slowly opened them back up, reaching to the other side of the bed, but it was empty. Warmth still emanated from the sheets, and I grinned. Belle had slept in my arms the entire night, and I’d watched her sleep for most of it.
I couldn’t believe my luck at having her with me, but more than that, I couldn’t believe what we’d done last night. I never planned to bring her back here. All I’d wanted was to take her for dinner and talk about things, but I should have known better. We weren’t the kind of people who talked around things. We felt, more than we probably should have, which made for less of the bullshit and more of the truth.
We could have pussyfooted around it longer than we needed to, but we’d already lost time. Time neither of us could get back. So I’d taken a chance. I’d leaped at her like a tiger with its prey. But she’d responded back just as fiercely, and I couldn’t wipe the grin off my face at the memory.
I sat up and scrubbed my hand over my face, trying to wake myself up fully. The bathroom door was wide open with no signs of Belle, so I pushed out of bed and pulled a pair of sweats low on my hips. I had no idea what time it was, as I walked across my bedroom, no idea how long we had until we had to go and pick Leo up, but I craved more alone time with her. I was being selfish, but I didn’t care.
The bedroom door creaked as I opened it, and I headed down the hallway past two doorways. One was another bathroom, and the other was the nursery. That door was ajar, so I peeked inside, and what I found was the most beautiful thing in the world. I pushed the door open more, careful not to make any noise, and leaned against the doorframe.
Belle stood in the middle of the room, her attention focused on the crib and then the letters L-E-O in blocks of painted wood on the wall above it. The walls were a combination of blue, green, and yellow, the perfect mix for our baby boy. I’d planned to wait until he was born before I’d painted it, but as he’d come earlier than we’d expected, it meant I could finish it sooner.
“Did you build this yourself?” she asked, pointing at the crib, but she wasn’t looking at me. All of her atten
tion was focused on the bedding I’d put inside it. The room was completely finished, complete with a rocking chair in the corner, just like I’d imagined.
“I did,” I croaked out, not able to resist moving closer. My footsteps were slow and measured, and I halted a step behind her, waiting to see what her reaction was.
“I love it.” Her voice was soft, almost as if she was in awe of the room. “I love the lion on the L too.” I glanced up at the blocks of letters and the painted image of a lion. I’d found them online, and I had to buy them.
“Me too,” I murmured, moving my hands onto her arms. I skimmed my palm down her bare skin and grinned at the sight of my shirt on her. It swallowed her, coming to just under her knees. “I was going to show you later.” Nerves rolled through me at her seeing the room before I’d been ready. I’d had a whole speech planned out, but it was too soon for that. Right?
“We never spoke about what would happen after I had the baby,” she said slowly. Her back was still to me, so I had no idea what the expression on her face was. Was she sad? Happy? Apprehensive? It took all of my willpower not to spin her around so I could see.
“We didn’t,” I acknowledged, my voice rough.
The silence swirled around us, so many unsaid things hanging in the air, but I wasn’t sure how to approach it. When it came to my work, I made a decision and stuck by it, but when it came to Belle, I was scared. Scared she wouldn’t want the same things I did. Scared she’d walk away.
But last night…
Last night she’d told me she loved me, just like I had with her. That meant more than anything, and I realized with clarity that now was as good a time as any. I could wait. I could wait her out and keep living day to day, but I didn’t want to. The truth was, I wanted her here with me. I wanted her here with Leo. I wanted us to be a family.
But did she want the same thing?
“I…” I swallowed and gripped her arms in my hands, needing to center myself. “I know what I want,” I ventured. Her body tensed, and I wondered what she was thinking. I needed to see her face, so I spun her around. Her eyes were downcast, her hands joined in front of her, and I could practically feel the nerves rolling off of her in waves.
“What…” She lifted her head, her blue-eyed gaze meeting mine. “What do you want?”
I tilted my head to the side, trying to take my time, but it was harder than I’d imagined. I’d never been good at filling up a sentence with words I didn’t need, so I got right to the point. “I want you.” Pulling in a breath, I moved my hands to the side of her neck. “And Leo. I want you both.” Her eyes flashed, and she opened her mouth, but I didn’t give her the chance to answer. I had to say it now, or I was afraid I never would. “Here. With me.”
Her mouth opened again, and I waited for her to answer me, but she was in shock, her features stuck on pause. She was processing, I knew that, but it was the longest minute of my life, until she asked, “What are you saying, Ford?”
I cleared my throat and pushed my fingers into her hair. “I’m saying…no…I’m asking.” I bent at my knees, so my face was level with hers. “Move in with me?”
She blinked.
And then she blinked again.
I could tell the wheels were turning in her head, but I didn’t want her to overthink it. I wanted her to listen to her gut, but I couldn’t say that without it coming off as pushy, so I waited. Waited for her answer, waited for her to form her words. And finally…
“But so soon? We only had our first date last night.”