Etching Our Way (Broken Tracks 1)
Page 140
His lips lift at the corner before he looks down at the baby and then back up at me. “Of course. Although it’s not what I expec—” His body tenses and his eyes widen. “Harm, what’s happening?” His voice is panicked as he looks at the machines that start to beep like crazy around him. “I… Harm?”
I sit up, cradling the baby I’m holding against my chest as I look around for Nurse Franklin. I can see the back of the baby that Tris is holding moving up and down rapidly as it shakes uncontrollably. “Don’t panic, Tris. Everything’s okay.” His eyes look far away as he watches Nurse Franklin and another nurse rush in and take the baby off him.
He stands and starts to back away toward the door, his eyes focused on the nurses working to get the baby stable.
“Tris, look at me.” His gaze flashes toward mine but immediately darts back as if he’s not really seeing me. I’m frustrated because I can’t go after him. “Nurse, can you please take him?”
A nurse standing off to the side takes “Baby F” from me as Tris walks out of the door. I walk out after him but he’s not here. His clothes are still beside mine in a pile so I walk out into the hallway, catching sight of him as he turns the corner to the stairwell.
I run to catch up and find him running down a flight of stairs. “Tris? It’s okay, he’s stabilizing.”
He stops but doesn’t turn to look at me. “I can’t…” His voice breaks, causing a lump to bubble up in my throat. “You… you shouldn’t have brought me here.” He shakes his head, still not looking back at me.
“I wanted you to understand. If you’re serious about us, you need to know that we can never…” My heart breaks saying the words. “We can never have kids.”
I can see his back moving as he gasps for breath before he turns around. “You didn’t need to bring me here to tell me that, Harm.” He rakes his hand through his hair, blowing out a breath. “This place… I can’t…” He bends at the knees and lets his head drop in his hands.
“You can’t what? Be here and support me? I’m sorry for what’s happened to you, Tristan, I really am. But you need to stop running. You can’t keep doing this every time something reminds you of her.”
My voice echoes around the stairwell, making my statement a whole lot more powerful. But it breaks to silence; silence that is so full of tension that I wait on bated breath for his reply.
He laughs sarcastically—a laugh that I’m getting a little tired of hearing—before he stands and takes two steps toward me. “You’ll never understand, Harmony. I get why you wanted to bring me here, I do. But that in there?” He points back toward the hallway that we came out of. “That was too much for me. This weekend has been too much.”
I sigh in defeat, maybe he’s right. Maybe I shouldn’t have brought him here. “Let me get our things and I’ll take you home.”
“No.” My head snaps up at his tone. “I’ll make my own way home.”
“Tristan, it’s not a—”
“Harmony.” His voice is a warning. “I’m leaving and you’re staying.”
I’m gobsmacked at his blatant order, not really knowing what to say back to him. I’m a patient person, but this is all too much. “You know what? Leave. Run. Apparently it’s your signature move.”
I wait for his reply but all he does is shake his head, turning and continuing walking down the stairs.
I turn and push the door behind me open with force, hearing it bang off the wall as I walk away, tears rolling down my cheeks at his selfishness.
Birdy, RHODES—Let It All Go
Pentatonix—Say Something
Mo—Unsteady
My jaw clenches and I grip the steering wheel tightly, my knuckles turning white as the leather creaks from my grip before I come to a stop. My eyes narrow at the red light that shines bright, willing it to change so that I can get the kids to their art class and be out of there as soon as possible.
I haven’t spoken to Harmony since Sunday; since the hospita
l.
What I said may have been harsh, but she wouldn’t understand how that set me off. How it brought back so many memories. Memories that I don’t want to have to relive.
Natalia’s face and Harmony’s are blurring together; flashbacks twirling together and playing in my mind like a movie trailer. My eyes burn from lack of sleep and my head hurts from not being able to relax.
It’s taking a toll on me, and I don’t know whether it’s because I ran—again—or whether it’s my body and brain’s way of telling me that maybe Harmony and I aren’t meant to be.
Maybe what we had should stay in the past? Maybe that’s all we’re ever going to be?
The whole weekend feels like it went to crap, and I honestly don’t know what to do, how to act or what to say about it all.