“I’m going to see some of your memories, Tristan. It’s unavoidable when a witch claims someone,” Lily cautioned. “But I promise I won’t pry.”
“Wait—you see our memories? From childhood and stuff?” Una asked anxiously.
“Not necessarily from childhood,” Rowan answered. “But it’s common for a witch to see formative memories—either choices you’ve made in the past or a current issue you might be facing in your life. It really depends on the claimed.”
Una bit her lower lip and looked away. Lily noticed that Breakfast took Una’s hand in support, and knew there had to be a skeleton in Una’s closet that maybe only Breakfast knew about.
Lily looked at Tristan and reminded herself to move very slowly.
“Ready?” she asked.
“Do it,” he answered.
She reached forward and gently took Tristan’s willstone between her finger and thumb. He gasped.
Lily saw …
… Lily. I have to go by her house after Little League practice because I left my Hot Wheels in her room. I wish Lily played baseball. Then we could hang out all the time. I hope we’re in the same classes next year. She’s been sick a lot lately and everyone talks about her when they think I’m not listening. It’s like they’re scared of her or something since she had that seizure. I’m not scared of her. She’s the only person who calms me down. I don’t know why, but whenever she’s not around I feel upset. Like something’s missing.
… Miranda unbuckles my belt. I look out the windows of my car to make sure no one’s around. Shit. There are tons of people still in the parking lot after practice. I really should stop her. Lily isn’t technically my girlfriend, but we did make out yesterday. I wish I hadn’t done that. I’m not ready for Lily. Miranda’s hand finds what she’s looking for and she smiles when I groan, like she’s won something. What an idiot. It’s Lily I love, not Miranda. Lily’s the only person I’ve ever loved, and someday I’m going to marry her. But not today. Miranda’s head lowers down to my lap. A few seconds of feeling whole. It’s only ever just a few seconds, but it’s better than nothing.
… Who the hell is this guy telling me I can’t see Lily? After the crap I’ve gone through for her, and he’s saying I can’t come in? I tell him to get out of my way and he stops me. Damn, he moves fast. Wait—did I give him my name? How does he know my name is Tristan? There’s something so familiar about this guy. Rowan Fall. I’ve never seen him before in my life and right now he’s acting like he knows Lily better than I do. I should hit the bastard. How did he just block me? Wow. He’s really strong. Like, impossibly strong. He says something about Lily having been through a lot. He’s not lying. I can tell he really cares about her.
… Rowan and Lily. I’m staring at how their bodies mirror the other’s movement, even when they aren’t looking at each other. They lean toward each other without even knowing it. They’re totally screwing. Oh my God, I lost her. I lost Lily twice. Once when I thought she was dead, and now because I know she loves him more than me. I can’t believe how much this hurts.
I’m sorry I hurt you, Tristan.
I hurt you first. Do I have any chance at all?
Lily smiled sadly at him and shook her head. She released his willstone and leaned forward to kiss him on the cheek. Still deeply connected to Tristan, Lily felt an echo of her own lips touch her cheek. She also felt the regret that flooded Tristan as he realized how passionless, how sisterly, Lily’s kiss was.
“Everyone should rest,” Rowan said gently. “I have a lot to teach you in the morning.”
I don’t want to dream, Rowan. I’m scared Carrick will be there in the dark.
I wish I could promise that my dreams will be safer for you, Lily, but I don’t think they will be tonight. The best I can do is promise that I won’t leave your side or let the fire go out.
Lily stared at the flames in the fireplace, pulling the heat into her skin, as Rowan lay down and wrapped his arms comfortingly around her.
* * *
Lily awoke at dawn. She looked around the room at the cozy heaps of blankets and sleep-slackened limbs, listening to everyone breathe. The fire was banked low, but it still burned as Rowan had promised. She eased out of his arms and went to the window. The sky looked like lead, and the flat light seemed to drain hue from neutral tones and add intensity to bright ones, like a black-and-white film that had been painted over with splashes of color-saturated ink.
She could feel him out there. Carrick was somewhere close by, watching the house.
She felt Rowan wake up and heard him roll over to look at her. She turned to face him and for a moment saw herself as he saw her. She saw how she glowed ivory white and fire red in his mind. She was a thin thing, like a gleaming razor’s edge—deadly, not delicate.
We should get started. Your new mechanics need a lot of work.
Rowan got up and went to Lily first. He ran his hands down her bare arms and rested his lips against the top of her forehead, just below her hairline. He took a moment to pull warmth and energy directly from her skin, rather than using willstones. It was an intimate gesture, and Lily sensed that it had special meaning between a witch and her mechanic. As he soaked in a bit of Lily’s essence, she felt a bit of herself nestle deep inside his body. After only a few seconds he pulled away with a contented smile and went to the kitchen. Deliberately noisy clanks and slams soon followed, waking everyone else.
“You’re a sadist,” Una groaned loudly in Rowan’s general direction. She and Breakfast untangled themselves from each other and sat up.
Lily? Are you still there?
I’m still here, Tristan.
For a second I wondered if I’d dreamed it.