Rowan nodded sadly. “You have no idea.”
“Tristan,” Una implored. “Back me up.”
“I’d go in a second,” he said with a shrug. “My life here is over anyway.”
Una looked at Lily hopefully, biting her lower lip.
“No,” Rowan said.
“Yes,” Lily countered quietly. She looked at Rowan. “It’s never going to end unless I go back. And who’ll be next? Juliet? My mom? Rowan—I can’t run from Lillian any more than I can run from myself, and it was stupid of me to even try. I have to go back.”
Rowan’s face crumbled. Lily felt that unthinkable thing well up in him again.
Back to her army. What will I do…, he thought before shoving a new, dark idea away.
Rowan, if I use that army, it will be to fight Lillian. How could you ever think anything different of me?
I don’t want you fighting at all! Your last battle against Lillian almost killed you.
She sighed, frustrated. As soon as she decrypted one confusing part of Rowan’s feelings it seemed another even more baffling emotion swooped in to take its place. She honestly didn’t know what he wanted from her, probably because he didn’t know himself.
“So, we’re leaving,” Breakfast said disbelievingly.
“I am,” Una said, uncertainty creeping into her eyes. “But I can’t force you to come with m
e.”
“If you’re going, I’m going,” he growled. “I told you—you’re never getting rid of me. Even if I have to follow you to another universe.”
“Good.” She smiled, suddenly shy, and took his hand.
Tristan stood. “I have paper and pens in my car. We should let Scot’s family know where to find him. And we should all leave notes for our families.” He looked at Lily, one corner of his mouth tilted up in a regretful smile. “It isn’t right to just disappear on people.”
They hiked back to Tristan’s car in silence. Lily reached out to Juliet in mindspeak and shared what had happened and how they had come to the decision to worldjump. Juliet fought Lily leaving at first, but she stopped when Lily pointed out that their mother could be next.
I wish I could go with you, Lily.
No! It really is unbelievably dangerous there, Juliet. And anyway, you need to stay with Mom.
Aren’t you at least going to come back and say good-bye, Lily?
I don’t know if I can, Jules.
Lily looked up at the rest of the group. “Do you guys want to go home and say good-bye to your families in person?” she asked.
“We can’t run the risk of being separated. Carrick wants you all to panic and scatter,” Rowan objected gently. “If you split up to go to your homes, I guarantee Carrick will be waiting for one of you. It’s what I’d do.”
“And all of us going to each other’s houses together would take too long,” Una added. She looked down at her blood-soaked clothes. “We’d get caught for sure.”
“Yeah, I wouldn’t put it past Simms to come by my house at dawn. Or any one of our houses,” Lily said.
“She likes to drop by and harass suspects,” Tristan said bitterly. “She came to my house every day for a week straight after you disappeared, Lily.”
“It’s probably better if we just leave letters and go now,” Una said, her voice rough. They all stopped and looked at one another, their faces saddened as the enormity of their decision sank in.
“Wow. This is it,” Breakfast said, stunned.
“Yeah,” Una said, nodding and looking blankly at the ground.