“West?” Alaric exclaimed. Lily had never seen fear in his eyes before, not even on the night they went into battle, but she saw fear now. “You have no idea what lies west of that river. I do.” It was Alaric’s turn to look to the bystanders for support. And he got it from Rowan.
“The Misi-Ziibi is Pack territory, and past the Pekistanoui is the Hive,” Rowan said, his voice low. “With a witch, we could survive the Pack. But even with a witch’s army, the Hive would tear us apart. It’s impossible, Lily.”
“Has anyone tried?” she asked, refusing to give up. “Rowan, you told me yourself that no one knows that much about the Hive. Has a witch ever fueled an army of Outlander braves to fight them?”
Alaric shook his head. “You’re asking my people to fight to the last man, Lily. We are too few to risk that.”
“Please try,” Lily begged, tears in her eyes. “I’ll fight and die with you if I have to, but don’t attack the cities, Alaric. Please.”
“Lillian swore to find a way to get rid of Woven, and I waited, hoping that she would, because I don’t want to use those bombs. I’m not a madman,” he said tiredly, and Lily knew he was speaking the truth. Alaric was tormented by this decision, but it was a decision he had already made. “I just want my people to survive. We are on the brink of extinction, and the only way to avoid that now is to attack our other enemy. The cities.”
“I won’t let you,” Lily said, swallowing her tears. She faced him, hating that she had to pit herself against this man, but like him, her decision was already made. “I’ll stop you, Alaric Windrider, no matter what I have to do.”
“Lillian said the same thing to me once.” Alaric looked at Rowan, regret etching deep lines into his face. “I guess this is the day Lillian comes back to haunt both of us.”
Rowan took Lily by the shoulders and pulled her away from Alaric. He looked her in the eye, pleading with her. “Remember when I told you that Lillian was a master at controlling minds? That she had years of practice and she could do things t
hat you never dreamed of? She’s using you. She’s twisting your mind so that you’ll take up her psychotic cause. But you’re just as strong as she is, Lily. You can fight her. You can stop this—”
Lily cut him off. “She’s not controlling me, Rowan. She showed me her memories. That’s it. I know what she knows, and that’s how she convinced me that what she’s doing is to protect this world—your world.”
“Then show me,” he said, his face lifting with hope. “Show me what she showed you and maybe it will convince me, too. We can find a solution. Lillian shut me out, but we can figure this out together. You and me, Lily. Please don’t shut me out like she did.”
Lily almost did it. She almost opened up her mind to Rowan and let him see everything. But the sound of the boy screaming when River dragged him by his hair to the chopping block filled her ears, and she knew she wouldn’t be capable of keeping that from Rowan. No matter how hard she tried to hide it from him, he’d keep digging, searching for why his father had to die, because that’s what he really needed to understand. It wasn’t about the bombs for him. Lily could easily show Rowan the cinder world and that would explain her opposition to Alaric and his weapon, but it still wouldn’t explain why Lillian had killed his father. A half-truth wouldn’t work. It was all or nothing.
“I have to shut you out because I love you, Rowan,” she said. “But I’m begging you—have faith in me. Trust that I’m doing this for a good reason. For the best reason.”
His eyes unfocused and he looked through her, like he was remembering something. “And then she started hanging people,” he whispered.
There was no warning. His face didn’t change. He didn’t even really look at her while he did it. Rowan reached out and ripped Lily’s willstones off her neck.
* * *
Lily couldn’t move.
But it didn’t hurt. There was no feeling of invasion or violation as there had been when Gideon and Carrick had taken her stones. Rowan was too much a part of her for her willstones to revolt against his touch. She simply couldn’t move a muscle, not even to close her eyes. Her will had been separated from her physical body, leaving her as limp as a darted grizzly. She was aware that it was something Rowan was doing to her stones that made her like that. His will was suppressing hers somehow, and he was so powerful she couldn’t even blink.
It was difficult to focus on what was happening around her. People started yelling. Juliet was frantic. The Tristans went for Rowan, calling him a traitor and worse. Rowan pulled out his knife and stood over Lily. Caleb put himself in the middle. He was trying to make sense of it all. Alaric defended Rowan, saying that if Rowan had done this to Lillian to begin with, no one would have died. Alaric’s painted warriors appeared out of nowhere and the Tristans were dragged away. Juliet cried. Lily hated seeing her sister cry.
Lily felt herself being lifted and carried. Rowan had her, but she couldn’t see him because her head had fallen to the side. All she could see was the ground and people’s legs as they went past. He put her in a cage and locked it.
He didn’t look back.
The farther Rowan took her willstones away from her body, the hazier everything became. It was night and then it was day again. Someone tried to pour water between her lips, but Lily’s jaw was clamped shut. Night came, and Lily could have sworn she saw two Breakfasts standing in the group that came to stare at her and argue. One Breakfast had the same short hair she’d always seen him with, and the other had long hair that was braided with beads and feathers like an Outlander’s. The longhaired Breakfast was pleading with the group. He kept saying that the technology for the bombs had been stolen from another world and that they would create a cinder world like the ones he had seen in his spirit walks. Lily wondered when Breakfast had learned to spirit walk. More arguing followed.
Everyone went away.
The stars were so bright they dazzled Lily’s eyes. A shadow suddenly blocked them out. Its hunched shoulders and cocked head reminded her of Carrick. He stood outside her bars, staring at her. He told her not to worry, that he would take care of the bombs. Remove just one part and they couldn’t explode, he said. The shadow crouched down close to her, holding up a little metal piece. He said a man had died over it. There was blood on his hands. He reached through the bars and touched her cheek, telling her that they were on the same side now. He said that everything had turned. He was her true champion and Rowan had become her torturer. He stroked her cheek. He said that she would learn to love him, that he wasn’t so different from his brother after all.
The shadow went away.
Dawn came and turmoil came with it. Arguments thundered over her like a storm cloud. Alaric came to her cage, opened it, and shook her limp body. He was demanding she tell them where the missing thing had gone. He leaned close to her. There was rage in his eyes and he said he wanted her dead before she got to the other bombs. Rowan pulled him away. He said Lily couldn’t be responsible. Look at her, he shouted. Alaric calmed down and said that it didn’t matter anyway. They’d make another copy of the missing piece as soon as they found Hakan. Rowan looked at Lily for a long time after Alaric went away. His face suddenly changed and he rubbed something off her cheek. Blood, he whispered. He looked around, frightened, and then locked her back in her cage.
Lily’s eyes grew dim.
She felt arms lifting her, carrying her away. Everything was dark. Maybe she was dying. She felt a deep, dull pain as if someone were moving the bones around in her body, and then she recognized the warmth of her willstones against her skin. She had her willstones back again. She drew in a gasping breath. She saw Tristan’s face. Her Tristan, and everything came back into focus. Tristan attached her willstones around her neck for her.
“She’s alive,” he said, his hushed voice breaking with relief. She felt water in her mouth and swallowed it, but it wasn’t enough. She gulped the water down frantically, tasting a hint of herbs that eased the pounding in her head. She heard another voice whisper to Tristan, and the canteen was taken away. Her eyes slid shut.