It took time to reconcile the urge to torture oneself like you often did with humiliation and cuckolding.
“I still can’t believe I want to feel that jealousy,” he confessed under his breath. “I hate jealousy.”
I hummed and combed back his hair with my fingers. “It’s the same as with any type of pain. There’s good and there’s bad. You’re a masochist—you know this. You wanting me to whip your sweet little ass sometimes doesn’t mean you want to get beat up by a stranger on the street.” I cupped his jaw and rested my forehead to his. “Same goes for me. I only want to expose you to the pain that turns you on in one way or another. I would never do anything to hurt us.”
He closed his eyes and drew a deep breath. “You text him. Make us collide. I trust you.”
As if on cue, that dark fog rolled in and blanketed me, filling me with carnal instincts and desires.
“Then I suggest we discuss limits at dinner.” I left a trail of soft kisses along his jaw. “I’ll reach out to Franklin and plan a scene after that.”
“Yes, Master,” he exhaled. “Don’t tell me too many details.”
“I won’t.” As I captured his mouth with mine, I already knew one change I was going to make. We were gonna move this party to Mclean. Our home was still sacred; we’d never played with anyone here, and I wanted to keep it that way for now.
I also had to call KC.
CHAPTER TEN
Franklin Townsend
“Are you ready for bed, princess?”
She nodded and put back her toothbrush in the glass on the sink. Hand in hand, we left her bathroom and returned to her castle. And even now, after already mapping out her entire room, every square inch of it, I threw glances around to see if I’d missed anything. Her new bedroom in my condo had to look exactly the same. It was my mission. From the hideously pink wallpaper, which had taken me days to track down online, to the doll collection and books sitting neatly on the shelves below the windows. Thankfully, I’d be able to bring most of her toys, but I’d had my assistant at work help me find the furniture and toy boxes.
Lily’s bed had been easy to find, because it hadn’t been discontinued at the store where we’d bought the first one last year.
While she climbed up the few steps to get into bed, I ducked below to switch off the light in her fort. The space underneath her bed was holy. It was where she found solace after meltdowns, where she was surrounded by stuffed animals, pillows, blankets, and string lights.
“My hair, Daddy,” she reminded.
I straightened and helped her pull back her dark, wavy mess into a short ponytail. This girl did not accept hair in her face when she slept.
Then I grabbed the purple container from her nightstand.
“Here I go!” she announced as usual. Her soft brown eyes twinkled with humor, a sight I couldn’t get enough of these days.
I smiled at my little goofball, and she removed her hearing aid and placed it in the container. She still refused to wear the second one.
She immediately switched to sign language. “Will you pick me up from school tomorrow?”
“Yes, today was just an exception.” I opted to respond both verbally and in sign, something we were working on. We wanted Lily to be comfortable using different methods of communication as a way to complement one another, not just one or the other. But it was going to take time. It was difficult for her to split her focus.
“I don’t like exceptions,” she signed.
I chuckled and leaned over to kiss her forehead. “I know you don’t, princess. You know what? Neither do I. But sometimes, they are necessary.”
She huffed and fell back against her pillow. “Lily loves Daddy,” she signed next, and she added something I wasn’t familiar with.
“What did you sign?” I asked.
She spelled out “anyway,” at which I laughed.
“I’m glad you love Daddy anyway, despite the exceptions.” I tucked her in properly, the way she demanded. “Daddy loves Lily too. So, so, so much.”
She smiled in satisfaction and grabbed a book from the nightstand. “Good. Goodnight, Daddy.”
She wanted me gone. Ever since she’d learned to read, she didn’t see the point with my reading to her anymore. Bedtime stories were history.
I grinned faintly and touched her cheek. “Goodnight, princess. I’ll see you after school tomorrow.”
A moment later, I walked out of her room and closed the door. And like a snap of my fingers, my mood sank. I hated this godforsaken house, I hated the décor, the way Samantha had turned the place into a shrine for gaudiness, and I hated the lack of warmth. Lily’s room was seemingly the only exception, because she’d chosen the design herself based on what she loved.