Savage Saints (Monsters of Saint Mark's)

“Oh, you don’t want the cheapest,” she says.

“Why not?” he asks.

“It’s cheap for a reason. If you want nice bulls, you have to feed them well. You are what you eat.”

I can tell Pell is getting frustrated, so I decide to take over. “Give us something in the middle.”

“OK. Let’s go with half-and-half. That way you get your protein and—”

“We’ll take it,” Pell says.

Issue Girl smiles. “How much do you boys need?”

“How much, do you think?” Pell ask me.

I just shrug. I have no idea.

“How many bulls are you feeding?” Issue Girl asks.

“Fifty or so.”

“Thirty-two,” I pipe up. “Not all of them want hay.”

Pell glances at me with a shut-the-fuck-up look on his face.

Issue Girl appears confused. “What do you mean not all of them want hay?”

“Don’t listen to him,” Pell says. “He’s been drinking.”

The girl chuckles. Winks at me.

I blink at her, wondering if that was intentional, or maybe she has something in her eye.

“Well,” she says, “depending on how often you want to do this little dance, you can buy fifty or five hundred.”

“Five hundred?” Pell looks at me, about to lose his shit. “How much would that cost? And how long would it last?”

“A bale might last you three or four days per bull. So five hundred might get you… six weeks? Half-and-half is going for about twelve dollars a bale right now, so that would come to…” Her eyeballs roll up a little as she does some arithmetic in her head. “About seven thousand dollars.”

Pell turns and walks out.

Issue Girl looks at me with surprised eyes.

“Don’t mind him,” I say. “He’s always moody like that.”

“I get it,” she says. “Times are tight, right? Everybody’s broke these days. And feeding cows is never cheap, even when it’s eight dollars a bale.”

I want to agree with her, but times are not tight with us. We’re not even using real money. But the more we spend, the longer Pie will have to work for Tarq. “How long would a hundred last?”

“About a week. And that would come to about fifteen hundred with tax. Do you need it delivered? That’s an extra hundred or so, depending on where you boys live. And if you want it stacked, that’s an extra two hundred.”

I suck in a deep breath as I hold up a finger. “Can you give me a moment?”

She closes her book and smiles. “Sure. I’ll be here all day.”

Pell is pacing the parking lot when I go outside.

“Seven thousand dollars?” he growls. “Every six weeks? No.” He stops pacing and shakes his head. “No. No way. There has to be another answer to this problem.”