“I have always loved you,” he tells me and I’m quick to say it back and kiss him on the lips, even though Melissa is standing right there, trying to interrupt us with a cup of coffee.
She can see me making out with him. I don’t care in the least.
Let the whole damn town see.
I love Asher Hart and I’m going to kiss this man every day for the rest of my life.
Asher
One week later
This house isn’t even close to being done, but lying in bed with Bri makes it feel like home already. The comforter is pulled up around us with the breeze feeling just right as it blows in through the window that’s cracked open. Her soft curves are pressed against my body and her arm is wrapped around my chest as I lie on my back while she lies on her side.
Even if the mattress is on the floor and there aren’t enough cardboard boxes to fill this place, it’s everything I wanted it to be.
We’ll fill it up over time and make it feel like ours even though according to Bri, a home is never done. Little by little, we’ll make our life together here.
Right here, just the two of us.
“So your mom is coming tomorrow?” Bri whispers and her warm breath tickles my chest. As she readjusts, the mattress creaks under us.
“Mm-hmm.” I hum my confirmation and kiss her forehead. Anxiousness creeps through me at the idea of my mom coming home. She only agreed because my father left for rehab. It’s one where you have to stay 24/7.
Growing up, I never questioned if my parents loved each other. I always knew they did and hell, they were my role models. My father admitted when his father passed and then his mother in the same year, that’s when things went to hell for him. Him acknowledging he has a problem is progress, so I’ll take it.
Rubbing a hand down my face, I try not to think about it. Bri sits up, planting a kiss on my collarbone and telling me it’s going to be okay. She’s a mind reader, I’ll tell you that.
“I know, I know,” I tell her and my voice is tired.
Hers is just as tired as she settles back down and says, “If you knew that, your heart wouldn’t be racing right now.”
Staring up at the ceiling, watching the fan spin, I think of what I can possibly say, but Bri says it all for me. “It’s okay to be scared, Ash. Too much is out of our control but we can be here for them and I’m here for you,” she says the strongest words with the weakest tone as exhaustion threatens to pull her under.
“I love you,” she whispers against my chest before yawning.
Kissing her hair, I whisper that I love her too and I nearly let her drift off, but I’m learning to let her in, even into the spots I don’t know are safe. The areas of my life I don’t know I can fix.
“What if … what if he can’t quit it?” I ask her and my throat is tight.
“He can try again,” she answers.
“What if my mom doesn’t forgive him?”
She hesitates this time and I know why. Neither of us know if my parents will ever be together again. He nearly sold her family’s house out from under her. My mom hasn’t been doing the best, if I’m being honest.
“I think … when it comes to others, it’s more a matter of being there for them so they can heal and if part of their healing is putting up walls …” she’s careful with her words, “then you just have to be there for them during that too.”
Swallowing thickly, I nod. There’s a part of me that blames myself. Like if I’d been stronger, if I’d paid closer attention, I could have stopped it. I could have kept my parents together.
“It’s not your fault,” Bri whispers and I clear my throat before telling her that I’m going to be pissed if I find out she can actually read minds.
“I just know you, Asher. You can’t fix everything,” she adds and kisses me fully this time. Splaying my fingers through her hair, I deepen the kiss. Needing her right now.
“I want to love you forever,” I admit to her.
“Well, that’s a damn good thing, she says as she nestles down, and lays her cheek on my chest, “’Cause I’ll be loving you forever too.”
Brianna