“I’m pretty sure you’re the only one who takes things in the out door,” Orlando teased. “Get it? What’s up assholes?”
“Ha-ha,” I replied, though I could see how I’d left myself open for the joke.
“Hey, don’t knock it until you try it,” Kris replied, which surprised me since he didn’t make it public knowledge he was bi. I knew, of course, because I’d had his tongue down my throat all through high school, and Megan knew because that was the kind of relationship she and Kris had. They were open with each other and trusted each other, so he wouldn’t keep that part of his identity from her. As far as I knew, no one else did, though.
“And you have?” Orlando asked.
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” Kris waggled his brows.
“Not about you personally, and especially not about Snacks, but is this something I should be asking Heather to try? I don’t want to miss out. Do you have a strap-on? I’m down to experiment with my wife. She likes it when she gets to be all bossy with me in the bedroom.”
I whipped my head in Orlando’s direction. “Um, too much fucking information, and don’t call me Snacks.”
“Why should gay guys get all the butt loving if it’s that good?” Orlando teased with a playful gleam in his eyes.
I flipped him off, and both Orlando and Kris laughed. I gave my friend the finger too. “Fuck you both very much.” I turned to Orlando. “And yes, you’re missing out.”
“Hmm. I’ll have to let Heather know.”
“You started this,” I told Kris.
He shrugged. “And I’d do it again. It’s fun.”
Patsy was our waitress today. She brought over three sodas, so she’d probably already been by before I arrived. We ordered, and I kept it small since I’d had the omelet Milo had made. Contrary to what my brother said, Snacks didn’t fit me anymore.
“So, what’s up with that guy the other day?” Kris asked.
“What guy? Does my little bro have a boyfriend?”
I rolled my eyes. “How old are you?”
“Young at heart, baby.”
I ignored that comment. “What do you mean what’s up with him?” I asked Kris.
“What’s up with who? I still don’t know who the guy is,” Orlando said. “I’m feeling left out.”
“Milo,” I replied just as Kris said, “He just seemed a little strange.”
Annoyance burned through me. “Don’t call him that. He’s not strange. He’s just…Milo.”
“Uh-oh,” Kris said, just as my brother teased, “Whoa…you do have a boyfriend. Gid and Milo, sitting in a tree.”
“Oh my God. Shut up. I don’t have a boyfriend, and I know what the uh-oh means too. I don’t like him in that way. I’ve known the guy for five minutes. He’s cute as hell, but mostly he’s just fun to be around. We’re friends.” And now I had to tell them he lived with me, which I suddenly wasn’t looking forward to. “Seriously, though, don’t call him things like that.”
“Sorry. I didn’t mean anything by it,” Kris apologized, and I knew he meant it. The truth was, Milo was different, and I could see that, but that didn’t make him weird or wrong. I didn’t know if he had any kind of diagnosis, and honestly, I didn’t care. He was just Milo who made me smile.
“He’s Wilma’s grandson,” I updated my brother, who was nearly bouncing in his seat; it was killing him so much to be out of the loop.
“Oh shit. So not a dick?”
“Definitely not a dick. He’s going to do a small remodel on the bookstore, actually. He wants to keep the current Little Beach charm, but update it some and make it a place people want to hang out. And so far, he doesn’t plan on kicking me out of my shop or my apartment. In fact, he movedinwithme.” I mumbled the last part as quickly as I could.
“So…wait…the guy you called cute…whom you defended…and swear you don’t like because you’ve only known him for five minutes, is now your roommate?” Orlando asked.
“Yes. That covers it.”
“You hate roommates,” Kris said.
“I couldn’t very well live in his apartment while he stayed at a hotel, could I?”
“As a renter you’re protected by certain rights, so yes, you could. At least for a while.”
“That’s not what I was saying, and you know it.” He was being purposefully obtuse.
“I think I need to meet him,” Orlando said.
“He’s basically your brother-in-law,” Kris added.
As much as they annoyed me, I chuckled. “I hate you both.”
“You should have a beach wedding,” Kris went on.
“I’ve never met one of your boyfriends before. Usually you just go to the mainland to have all that butt sex you didn’t tell me was so awesome.”
“Wait, you and Heather don’t…” Kris made a circle with the fingers on one hand and pushed his pointer in and out with the other.
“No, I mean, I’ve pitched, but like I said, we just haven’t done the strap-on, me-receiving thing.”