“Ali, please.”
“Ali,” she returns. “This is Misty and Khloe.”
The other two women walk up with quick, easy smiles, and it makes me remember a time when I was able to do the same.
I pray I can get back to being that person again.
“Hello,” I tell each of them. “Thank you for having me.”
“We seriously appreciate the help,” Misty responds.
“I was hoping to get started today.”
“Maybe you should get settled first,” Grace says with a soft smile.
“We could really use the help today,” Emmalyn counters, as if she knows that being useful is what I need. “Come on. We’ll show you around.”
I follow behind Emmalyn and Misty. Grace stays close as the different areas of the clubhouse are pointed out.
“We lost several rooms to create the daycare,” Emmalyn explains as we enter a hallway. “We had them combined into one large area.”
“Most everyone here is getting a new house built on the property,” Misty explains. “I don’t know if you saw all the construction on the drive in.”
“I did. The houses are gorgeous.”
“We’re really lucky to have all this property. Do you have an age group preference?” Emmalyn asks as we step into the expansive room.
“I don’t. I like kids in general. I’ve worked with babies and toddlers, mostly.”
This daycare would be every growing kid’s dream. It’s clean and the layout makes perfect sense. The cribs are sturdy, unlike the simple ones I’ve seen in the past. The diaper changing station is pristine and fully stocked.
“We have the kids in here for a multitude of reasons. Some parents are working or in college. Some just need a break or want to have alone time with their significant other,” Emmalyn says. “We’ll need you mostly in the mornings, but the hours are extremely flexible. If you need time off, just let one of us know and it’s yours.”
“Thank you,” I tell her, knowing I’m going to be here as much as I possibly can.
“Unlike a normal daycare, we don’t have strict drop-off and pick-up rules. We don’t have the daycare open on the weekends unless the guys are away, and then it’s usually just a child or two so errands can be taken care of.”
“Is it open to the public or—”
“It’s just the people directly connected to the club. No one is allowed in the clubhouse unless they’re invited by a member. Even when we have parties open to the public, everyone is required to stay outside,” Misty answers.
“This is our home,” Emmalyn adds. “It’s not open to anyone and everyone.”
I nod, liking the idea of this.
A baby squeaks in one of the cribs.
“Looks like Miss Aria is finally awake. Would you like to meet her?”
I grin at Misty, following her to the crib. My smile turns genuine the second I look down into the wide green eyes of the happy baby.
Chapter 2
Harley
Tilting my head to the sky, I take a deep breath, drawing the heated air into my lungs.
The warmer it gets, the more I miss my wife.
Lana absolutely loved the summer. She was looking forward to the dry heat that New Mexico has to offer. She never got to experience it. She only had a handful of weeks here in the winter before she was gone.
She’ll miss a lot of things. Her life taken way too early.
It’s been nearly six months since the car accident, and each day has been filled with the duality of the pain from losing her and the joy I feel every time I look at Aria. Having that piece of Lana has been my touchstone, the one thing I can be grateful for in this world.
I cringe, hating that I continue to take for granted all of the helpful people around me. They’ve offered me sanctuary in the clubhouse because I just can’t imagine going back to the home I was beginning to build with Lana. They love Aria and tend to her when I need a few moments to myself. They have no idea I spend most of that time wallowing in my grief.
I’ve taken that very same gun I held to my chest that first night out several more times, but I haven’t gotten so far as to touch it to my skin. I’ve decided I find strength in having it around and not picking it up, even though that’s not the healthiest way to live.
I know Aria needs me, and I’d never leave her by choice, but some days my pain and grief are almost too much to bear.
I allow the sun to beat down on my face until it grows hot and slick with sweat before walking into the clubhouse. Several of the men greet me, and I nod at them, turning quickly away when Slick looks like she wants to approach. I’ve been avoiding the woman like the plague because the last thing I want is her trying to analyze my psyche. Some days I could easily be institutionalized with the way I feel, but thankfully those days are growing further apart.