He stood and shoved the phone back into his pocket. I could see the hard outline of his cock straining against his shorts, and I assumed he didn’t want to leave.
“I told you I work for him. I do whatever I have to do.”
I stood up and followed as he walked quickly in the opposite direction of the spiral staircase. At the other end of the path were large stone stairs that led up toward the Water Works building and its Roman columns. We climbed the stairs quickly, and then started to walk back toward the Parkway. He didn’t hold my hand, and I had to work hard to keep pace.
“When can I see you again?” I asked.
He grunted and shook his head.
I didn’t want to press him, but I hated waiting between seeing him without any word.
“Can I see you after this job?”
“Not tonight.” His tone was firm.
“What are you going to be doing, anyway?”
He stopped walking and faced me. I nearly toppled directly into him. I felt like such a needy idiot, pressing him, but I was annoyed that we had been interrupted, and I wanted a straight answer from him.
“Listen, don’t ask any more questions about what I do for Michael.”
I looked up into his hard, beautiful face and realized that what I was mistaking for anger was actually fear.
“You can talk to me,” I said softly.
He shook his head. “No, I can’t. You don’t need or want to know what I do.”
“I’m here for you.”
“It’s too soon. Just, trust me.” He looked around the area as cars passed us on the left. “I have a bike just ahead. Do you need a cab?”
I shook my head. “No, I can walk.”
“I’ll call you soon.” He leaned in and kissed me. I breathed his smell deep and savored his skin, afraid it would be the last time I felt him. Finally, we broke apart, and he hurried over to a nearby bike rack. I watched him unchain his black bike, jump on, and speed off into traffic. I stood there for a few minutes savoring his still-lingering touch, until finally I realized I looked crazy daydreaming in the middle of the sidewalk. I hurried off toward my apartment, frustrated and uncertain.
Chapter Eleven
I still hadn’t heard from Rex by Saturday. I was worried, but I knew he would message me when it was safe. Or maybe he wouldn’t message me at all; everything he said suggested he thought it was best if we didn’t see each other. I honestly wasn’t sure what I wanted. If I was trying hard to be rational, I wanted nothing to do with him. Like Shane and Amy both said, he was a dangerous man involved with even more dangerous men, and being around him put me in a situation I didn’t think I could control.
But there was something pure about him that I couldn’t put into words. We couldn’t have come from more different backgrounds, and yet I felt like he understood what I had gone through. The specter of my past that kept haunting me was a part of his life too, even if his ghosts were different from mine. He may have had it harder, but we both understood what it meant to fend for yourself. Plus, when we were together, no matter what he said, I felt safe and secure in his arms. He did something to my body I had never felt before with anyone else.
Work flew by in alternating moments of pure boredom, characterized by Marissa’s droning stories, and moments of intense anxiety, defined by my daydreams about whatever dangerous job Rex was doing for Michael. Saturday rolled around, and I knew I needed some kind of distraction, so I called Amy up.
“Hey, kiddo,” I said when she answered.
“What’s up, Darce?”
“Look, I need a little girls’ night. Maybe some ice cream and Sex in the City?”
“That’s the most cliché thing I’ve ever heard.”
I laughed. “I know, okay. How about wine and Jerry Springer reruns?”
“Perfect. When?”
“Tonight, if you can?”
There was a pause. “Sounds good to me. I’ll see you at your place?”
“Come over at seven.”
“See you then.”
After she hung up, I reflected on that pause. I guessed she was asking Shane for permission, but that wasn’t fair. Their relationship was much more complex than I originally realized, and because I was becoming much more familiar with complex relationships, I decided I needed to cut her some slack. Shane was a difficult man to be with, even if every inch of him was dedicated to making Amy happy. His privacy issues may have been intense, but I was sure he had his reasons. More than that, I didn’t know what it was like to live in his world. She was probably checking in with him, which was just a normal part of a regular relationship, and not some crazy controlling thing.