I swallowed hard. “Do you know where Cash Hayes is?”
“I do,” he revealed. “That’d be the bad news.” I stiffened, already suspecting I wasn’t going to like what he told me. “Cash is dead.”
My ears buzzed and I had to remind myself to breathe as an unexpected wave of grief washed over me. I hadn’t known him, had never spoken to him, didn’t know the first thing about the man, but still realizing I never would get to know him hurt more than I thought it could. “You…you said you had good news?” I questioned him hesitantly, absolutely sure nothing he said could be good.
“Cash Hayes ain’t your daddy,” he replied, eyeing me carefully.
“That’s the good news,” I confirmed, my voice barely audible.
“Good or bad depending on your perspective,” he agreed, tapping my chin and my jaw locked. “Cash Hayes isn’t your daddy.” I wanted to tell him to stop, to shut up, to not say whatever he was about to say, but that was like asking Nico to give up karaoke. “I am.”
It was only then that I realized no one was shouting. In fact, the room was completely silent and I had to look around to see if anyone was still there. Cord was standing there, his expression impenetrable as usual. Crew looked as shocked as I felt. Creed’s gaze was sympathetic, almost as if he could empathize with how bad the news really was and the other brother, Clutch I assumed, looked like he had a migraine.
“No.” I shook my head, my lips pressing together. “Nope. I refuse to believe you.” Johnny opened his mouth and I raised my hand. “Hell no. I refuse to believe my mother ever had sex with you and since she can no longer confirm or deny, I will deny your claim.” I nodded sharply and pivoted, striding to the door when Johnny spoke.
“She had a birthmark on her hip.” My steps faltered. “She drank coffee the way a fish drinks water. She despised peanuts and your middle name is Lee.”
I spun around, blinking hard to keep the tears at bay. “How do you know that?” I stomped back to him, poking him hard in the chest. “How do you know my middle name?”
“Because it’s my middle name,” he replied softly. “If you’d been a boy, she would have named you Daniel.” He smiled sadly. “For her brother.”
“You knew about me?” I accused, everything I thought I knew about my life shattering before my eyes. “You knew and let my mother go?”
“No,” he swore. “I had no idea you existed.” I didn’t believe him. I shook my head, backing away and he grabbed me by the shoulders, holding on even as I tried to yank away. “I would have chased her to the ends of the earth if I’d known about you.”
“Why didn’t you?” I whispered, remembering all the times my mom would stare off into space, remembering a life she’d left behind. “She missed you,” I croaked, angry for her. I shook off his hold as he stared at me in shock. “I wish Cash Hayes was my father. At least then I could understand why he never tried to find her, to find us. He was dead,” I said thickly. “What’s your excuse?”
“Cadence,” he tried, reaching for me again, but I backed out of his reach.
“No, Johnny Lee, whatever your last name is. I don’t want to hear it. She told me to come here if I ever needed help, but,” I sniffed, wiping snot and tears off my face, “I don’t want your help. You’re the last person I would ever ask for help,” I screamed, seeing shock register on all their faces. Cord stepped forward and I shook my head at him. “No.” I pointed at Johnny. “She grieved you. Every day. She never found anyone else. She dragged me all over this damn country, trying to escape you, the memory of you.” I laughed, the sound maniacal even to my own ears. “She should have just stayed. Because here I am, chased by the same monster who wanted her.”
“I won’t let him touch you,” Johnny growled. “I won’t let anything happen to you.”
“Too late,” I informed him, knowing it wasn’t fair to blame my life on him, but unable to stop myself. I yanked my sleeves up, revealing the purple scars that bisected my arms. “I’ve already met monsters.”
I could feel their horrified gazes as they took in the brutal scars and I immediately regretted showing them. I pulled my sleeves down but it was too late. Johnny shook his head. “You’re still my daughter, like it or not, and I will make whoever did that pay,” he promised. I shoved the palms of my hands against my eyes, wanting everything to disappear, wishing I’d never come to this town and faced my mother’s choices.