Our food comes and Everly tells us more about school and the new friends she’s made. It’s not until we’re finishing our meal when I realize Aunt Kim hardly ate anything at all. She declined breakfast this morning too, and I got up early to make pancakes, vegan sausage and eggs, which Everly will actually eat since they came from Aunt Kim’s chickens, who “aren’t being forced to lay eggs for our benefit.”
“Do you have what you need for the sleepover?” I ask Everly when we get into the car.
“Yep! You’re dropping me off now, right?”
“Yeah. It’s not too early?” I look at the clock. The bonfire starts at eight and it’s only a quarter past seven.
“No, Maria said to come early so I can borrow something from her closet.”
And now I’m smiling again, heart so full to see Everly happy like this. Maria lives in a house along the lake, and Everly insists that I don’t need to come inside to see her off, so instead I just wave to Heather and watch Ev disappear into the house.
“She’ll be fine,” Aunt Kim says, knowing where my mind is going. “The Wilsons are good people and Heather has too much on the line as the assistant principal to let the party get too out of hand.”
“Good point. But I always worry.”
“I know.” Aunt Kim pats my leg and I back out of the driveway. “You turned out good, kid.”
“Thanks,” I say with a smile, turning to give Aunt Kim a quick glance. I’m not expecting the faraway look in her eye. “Are you all right?”
“I’m tired,” she says slowly. Her words rattle me. She’s not talking about being tired and needing a nap to feel better. She’s talking about being tired of life. “But don’t worry about me.” Her lips pull into a tight smile. We ride in relative silence the rest of the way to her house, and I go right into the barn to check on the horses for the night, tossing them all another flake of hay. I top off their water buckets and then go around to the run-in shelter to check on the llamas, Henry and Harry, as well as Bowser, the cow.
Aunt Kim is on the porch with a blanket wrapped around her shoulders. “You’re a natural out there.” She sits in her favorite rocking chair, wincing as she goes down. “Everly too. The horses can sense when you have a good heart, and I know without a doubt you both do.”
“We’re really enjoying being here.”
“Then consider staying.”
“I don’t know.” Shaking my head, I sit on the porch swing and push off with my feet. “My job is based in Indy. I can do most of it remotely, but being close to the office comes in handy when I have to go in. And those sales runs do pay extra.”
“I’ve watched some of my closest friends wither and die in jobs they weren’t passionate about.”
Her words are jarring, and I turn, expecting to see her smiling or at the very least give me a wink or something.
But she doesn’t.
“I’ve seen a lot throughout my time on earth. I spent years overseas and have met so many people. And you know the one common regret among them? Not spending enough time doing what they love with who they love.”
I rake my fingers through my hair. “I…I don’t really have a choice. I would have loved to go to college and do something more fulfilling but that wasn’t in the cards for me.”
“You don’t need a fancy degree to do something fulfilling.” Inhaling deeply, she gets up and comes to the porch swing. I plant my feet on the ground, stopping it from swinging.
“You’re a good kid, Josephine. Don’t lose sight of what’s important.” She kisses the top of my head and goes into the house. Riley sneaks past her, coming to me and wagging his tail. I think about Aunt Kim’s words as I pet him. I don’t want to lose sight of what’s important. I’ve been working more than usual, and I picked up a heavier workload last fall fulling assuming Everly would make friends at her old school and would be off with them more than she’d be home.
But that didn’t happen, and I can’t help but feel guilty for the time I was away. If I’d been home more this year, would I have noticed Everly was being bullied? Did I miss the obvious signs? That girl is smart and hid it well, and I hate that she hid it because she didn’t want to upset me when I’d been so busy with work.
“What do you think?” I ask Riley, who just responds with a wag of his tail. “I just don’t think it’s in the cards for us.” I go to the opposite side of the porch so I can look out at the barn. It’s not as simple as packing up and moving. I have a house to sell, Everly and I would eventually have to get our own house, and real estate is at an all-time high in Silver Ridge. Small houses are going for more than I can afford right now, and I really should take that sales job come fall.