She's Like The Wind (Angel Sands 2)
Page 90
Nate’s spine stiffened at his unexpected question. “I’m fine. Just doing what I need to do.”
“You shouldn’t neglect yourself though.”
“I’m not. And I’m sorry if it sounds insensitive, but the last thing I need is any advice from a guy who ran away and left his daughter to fend for herself. Did you know how hard things have been for Ally since you went away? How hard she tried to keep this place afloat.” Nate shook his head. “It’s nice to meet you, Mr. Sutton, but I have a lot to do.” He stood up. “Have a nice day.”
Grant didn’t look surprised at Nate’s outburst. “I deserved that. But it doesn’t mean I’m not speaking the truth.” He gave him a half smile. “I never wanted to hurt Ally. And I’ve made a lot of mistakes. Maybe you could learn a thing or two from them.” He cleared his throat, covering his mouth with his palm. “I hear you and she had something going on.”
Nate was still hovering by the chair. “Did Ally tell you that?”
“She didn’t need to.”
“Then there’s really nothing to talk about.” Nate went to walk away again, but his fingers were curled around the back of his chair and for some reason it was impossible to release them. As if his body wanted to stay right where it was.
“Did you know that when Ally’s mom died I was dating a woman called Marnie?” Grant continued, ignoring Nate’s gritted replies. “She used to work in Frank Megassey’s store. That’s how we met. She was a few years younger than me.”
“Fifteen, or so I hear.”
Grant laughed. “For a man who’s not interested you seem to know an awful lot about me.”
Nate shrugged but said nothing.
“Marnie wasn’t interested in having kids. She didn’t like to put roots down for long enough to have them. She’d been in Angel Sands for three years and as far as she was concerned, that was long enough. Just before my ex-wife died she was trying to persuade me to leave town and join her on a trip to Australia.”
“But you didn’t.”
“No. Circumstances took over. And being a good father was more important than being a good boyfriend right then.”
Nate said nothing.
“I know you probably think I’m a terrible father. But I didn’t want to be. I was determined to take care of Ally and make sure she was okay.” Grant nodded his head at the chair. “Can you sit back down? Looking up at you is making my neck ache.”
Grudgingly, Nate took his seat.
“I expect Ally told you that Marnie and I broke up soon after Ally came to live with us.”
“She did.”
“And did she tell you I never dated again?”
Nate blinked. “Never?” His voice was full of shock. “You didn’t have another relationship?”
“No.”
“I didn’t know that. Why not?”
Grant gave him a half-smile. “Because of Ally. She and Marnie had clashed like crazy. It had made things so much worse for her. Her grades dipped at school, and then she dropped out of the athletics squad.” He cleared his throat. “Did she tell you she used to run for state? There was talk of her going to the Olympics one day.”
“I heard.”
“Her dropping out was all my fault. If I’d been there for her more, spent less time with Marnie or at the café, then maybe she would have coped a little better. After I split with Marnie I didn’t want to introduce anybody to Ally. Didn’t want to upset her any more than she already was. So it became just the two of us, the two musketeers.” He rubbed his chin with his thumb. “We were so close that people used to remark on it all the time. What a lovely family we were, what a great dad I was.” Grant winced. “But I wasn’t a good father at all.”
“I’m not exactly running for father of the year myself.”
“Do you know the biggest mistake I made?” Grant asked, leaning forward on the chair.
“What?” At some point in the last few minutes Nate had gone from wanting to walk away to needing to hear more.
“I forgot that part of my role as a father was to prepare my daughter for the real world. To let her make mistakes. To let her face her fears. To let her feel sadness and learn how to deal with it. I thought I wanted to protect her, but really I wanted to protect myself from seeing her in pain or crying or anything else that every teenager has to go through whether or not they’ve lost a parent.” He let out a sigh. “I made it so she didn’t think she could live without me. She wouldn’t even leave town to go to college, did you know that? She got a scholarship and everything, but on the day I was supposed to drive her up there, she started unpacking all her bags. And that was my fault. All mine. I let her down.