Forbidden Love

25

Lourde

Iwatched Jessica’s teary apology live on the screen with my family around me in my parents’ den.

“Now, can you see?” I asked, turning to Dad. His serious look didn’t give too much away, nor did Connor’s.

“Mom?” Her mouth pursed into a thin line, but apart from that, nothing. Injectables had frozen any emotion as she sat there in her beautiful makeup, ready for the ball.

“Well, sorry, sis.” Connor walked up to me and slapped me on the back.

Okay, well, that’s a first, but I’ll take it from my brother.

“It doesn’t change a thing.” Mom stood up, smoothing down the satin dressing robe.

Dad glared at her but remained silent.

I muttered out a sound I couldn’t recognize. “What do you mean, it doesn’t change a thing? Barrett is in the clear in the public eye. You got what you wanted! This proves none of this was his fault!” This time, it was my time to stand, squaring off with my mother, seeing my father didn’t have the gall to do it.

A phone's melodic tone sliced the tension.

“I’ve got to take this,” Connor said, grabbing his phone. I waited uncomfortably for her to answer me back.

“His reputation is mud, Lourde.”

“No, it’s not! He’s cleared.”

“It’s already been tarnished. There’s no coming back from that.”

“You can’t be serious?” I turned to my father, dressed in his bowtie and black suit. “Dad, please?” I begged.

Dad looked up, then back down again after Mom turned to stare him down.

“Let’s just enjoy tonight’s ball, and we can discuss it tomorrow,” he said, offering me a weak smile.

“Do my feelings get a vote here?”

“Feelings? What do they have to do with anything?” Mom scoffed at her own comment.

My chest burned with rage. “I love him with everything I am,” I spat out.

“He pushed you away. He broke it off, Lourde. At least he had the decency to do that.”

The pain stung as the words left her mouth.

Would he take me back?

Would he ever forgive me for my family’s actions?

“You left him no choice.”

“There’s always a choice, dear, and he chose not to be with you.”

My throat clogged with emotion, her words poison ivy.

“Elizabeth, that is too harsh,” Dad said.

“Since when do you care about feelings, Alfred? You especially don’t care about embarrassing me, do you?”

“Don’t bring us into this. This is about our daughter.”

“Besides, Finigan is perfect for her. He will be at the Plaza along with two hundred guests very soon, so for once, I agree with your father. Let’s talk about this tomorrow. Not on the most important social day of the year.”

“Finigan and I will never, ever happen, Mom, get it through your head.”

“He is perfect, Lourde!” she reiterated.

“If he’s so perfect, why don’t you marry him!” I yelled. “Whatever’s going on between you two, obviously isn’t working!”

“Lourde!” Mom gasped, her face blooming with color.

“Well, she’s right, isn’t she, Liz?” Dad said, his revelation flooring me. What is going on with the two of them?

She blinked erratically. “I’m not… this is… not what I’m doing right now,” she stammered. “I have makeup waiting.”

“And there you go again, ignoring reality when it smacks you right in the face.”

“No, Alfred!” She raised her finger to Dad and walked away, pausing to look over her shoulder. “Lourde, I’m sorry, it’s just the way it is.” She turned back around and headed out the door into her quarters.

Tears pricked the backs of my eyes, but they dare not spill.

I felt Dad’s hand on my shoulders, pulling me in for a hug. “What’s going on with you and Mom, Dad.”

“It’s what’s always been going on, Lourde. You’re just more aware of it now. Or maybe I’m too old to hide the cracks of our marriage. But this isn’t about your mother and me.”

He turned toward me. “Do you love him, Lourde?”

I looked up at dad. “Yes.”

“Okay.”

“Okay?” I asked. “What does that mean?”

“It means leave it to me to fix.”

“But Mom?”