“The worst thing …” She paused and then looked up him. Even the mascara trails running down her cheeks didn’t diminish her beauty. It made her look precious and fragile, like a priceless object with a crack right down the middle.
“What’s the worst thing, baby?” He couldn’t hold back the endearment. Because even though she was so angry with him and probably hated him right now, she was and always would be the thing he cherished most in the world.
“The worst thing is I’ll never know whether we really fell in love. Every moment with you, all those memories we made, they weren’t real. I’ll never know if you really saw me. How could you when the whole time you were looking for someone else?”
* * * * *
MARA RODE THE elevator down, her arms wrapped around herself. She wasn’t sure if she was doing it to keep people away or to hold herself together.
She passed the doorman and several well-dressed people in the lobby but she could barely see them. She stumbled out into the cool night air and turned left, then right. The ding of the elevator car across the lobby propelled her forward. Trent would be coming after her.
She had to move.
A group of young women passed by chatting happily. Mara tucked her head and followed behind them, matching her gait to theirs.
“Mara! Mara!”
At the sound of her name she almost turned but caught herself at the last minute. Tears burned the backs of her eyelids and it took all her willpower not to turn back. It would be so easy to turn around, go to Trent and let him make the hurt go away. To let him reassure her that everything was fine and that he loved her. But the one thing she couldn’t do was lie to herself.
Ignoring the instinct to turn around and run to him, she crossed her arms and surged forward, allowing herself to blend with the flow of the pedestrian traffic.
She hadn’t brought a coat and she stood out in her evening gown and sparkly heels. In that moment she wanted to rip off the offending garments and run naked through the streets. It was just more evidence of how foolish she’d been. Trying to change herself to fit into Trent’s world, when the reality was she’d never fit in. She’d always been nothing more than a stand-in for the one thing money couldn’t buy.
The love he’d lost.
When they reached the corner, the chattering group of girls turned and she stopped.
“Where am I?”
A man walking next to her gave her a strange look so she tucked her head and went the opposite direction. The closest sign said “Park Avenue.” Wasn’t there a subway line somewhere nearby? The
n she bit her lip to hold in a sob. Even if she could figure out which subway line was closest, it wouldn’t matter since she didn’t have her purse. All she had was the phone in her hand.
After walking to the other side of the street, she stood next to one of the buildings and scrolled through the contacts on her phone. She couldn't call her brother yet. He'd dropped everything to follow her out here the first time and she knew he wouldn't hesitate to do it again. But right now, she didn't really need a lot of questions and outrage. As she scrolled past all the familiar names, she considered and discarded each one. They'd all want to help but they'd want answers.
She needed someone who would just get straight to the point and ask her what she needed. Then her thumb scrolled over a name that made her pause.
Ethan Westbrooke.
Her hands shook slightly as she pushed the button to make the call. If she thought about it too long she'd talk herself out of it. Right now, she needed the extra boost of courage that came with feeling desperate.
“This is Ethan.”
The deep, familiar baritone was so reminiscent of home and her old life, that tears sprang to her eyes.
"Ethan? It's Mara Simmons.”
"Mara? This is a surprise. Didn't you move to New York?"
She glanced around her, at the people, the cars honking and the unfamiliar buildings. It was a horrible feeling to realize that her "home" was a place where she no longer felt safe.
"Yeah, I did. I know it’s really late and I’m so sorry to do this to you, but I need some help."
There was a pause before he answered, "Of course. What do you need?"
"This is really embarrassing but I need a way to get out of the city. I just, need to get out of here." Her voice broke on the last part and her shame was complete. She was standing shivering on a street corner while crying to her former boss.
"He fucked up already, didn't he?"