“Then what the hell is it?”
“Don’t curse at me.”
“Then what is it? I’ve been dating you for two years, Lake. I know there’s something. Did, like, Ethan do some messed up shit to you or something?”
“Ew – what? No!” I wrinkled my nose. Caroline and Ethan Pike had just separated and were talking divorce. The kids at school were only whispering about it because their parents were. But apparently, I was thrown into the mix of rumors despite understanding nothing of their roots. Ethan was barely ever home and when he was, he hardly spoke to me or Callum. “It’s not that and don’t talk about that shit with anyone. Please. She’s going through a really hard time right now.”
“Fine. Just tell me what the issue with the sex is or I’m not going to be able to fix it.”
“Why do you have to fix it? I don’t want to have sex yet. I told you. I’m trying to hold off for as long as I can. People do that, okay?”
“Weird people do that. No one who looks and acts like you ever gets to eighteen without getting fucked.”
“Ugh, you’re crass.”
“Stop pretending to be all innocent.”
“I’m not innocent,” I spat. I still remembered the things I’d seen and heard before my grandma took me away from my mom. I was five years old then but I still knew how much worse things got when Trish didn’t have a man in her life. The house would stink, she wouldn’t eat and I’d be hungry day and night. I didn’t like her and I didn’t like them but at least when she had some semblance of a “special friend,” she’d go out and come back with leftovers from McDonald’s. She’d have more patience with me when I asked her to help me turn on the shower. The knobs had fallen off forever ago and it was broken, rusty and confusing. The one time I tried to finagle on my own, I cut my finger open and she got pissed that I needed a tetanus shot.
Theo rolled his eyes. “Well, if you’re not innocent, have sex with me. Do it with me tomorrow at Logan’s house. At his party. We’ll find a room.”
“How romantic.”
“Who cares about romantic – we’re just getting the first time over with so you can stop being such a pain in the ass.”
“Oh, you’re really selling yourself by talking like that.”
Theo groaned to the ceiling. “I’m sorry.”
“I thought you said you’d stop bothering me about this if I did the thing.”
“What thing?”
“The pictures.”
“Christ, Lake, I can’t jack off every day of my fucking life.”
I stared with true amazement. “You’re an asshole.”
“And you’re a fucking priss.”
I went to leave at that point but he pinned me to his bed and laughed at how I couldn’t move. He was a wrestler – he and Callum both – and while Callum was the one going to college for it, Theo was still very much strong enough to immobilize me. I cursed him out when he finally let me go and stormed out of his house, in tears by the time I got home. Caroline freaked out, of course, and when she couldn’t get anything out of me, she sent me to Callum. He flew into a rage when he saw that my wrists were still red. “I’m going to kill him,” he said, eerily calm. He was halfway out the door when I stopped him. I refused to let him go and his stare seared through me. “Are you going to break up with him?”
“Of course I am.” I had every intention of breaking up with Theo. I just couldn’t figure out the best time. I wanted to not think about it for a little but Callum was so worked up I knew that answer wasn’t going to suffice.
“If you give him time, he’s just going to put his hands on you again.”
“What, you want me to dump him the next time I see him? At Logan’s party?”
“Yes.”
“No.”
“I dare you.”
“It’s not your turn.”
“Fine. Dare me something now so it is my turn.”