I didn’t know what to expect when I walked into the office Monday morning. I’d spent the weekend in a mental limbo.
Friday evening had been a complete mind-fuck for me, and a weekend later, I wasn’t completely sure why. All I really knew was that I’d had sex with Julian in his office, it was way better than I imagined, and possibly way better than I wanted.
What that meant, however, I wasn’t sure. The further removed I was from the day the less I understood my reaction to whatever Julian and I shared. At the time, it felt as if I had to leave, or else I wouldn’t be able to breathe. But over the weekend, I repeatedly wished that I had stayed.
Especially since Julian was ready to go again by the time I slipped out the door. He kept stopping me as I got dressed, running his smooth lips along my mouth, my neck. I’d spent both Saturday and Sunday thinking about how he went from half-mast to rock-hard again the moment I’d kissed him back. It made me feel so good, so insanely sexy.
But then he didn’t contact me once over the weekend. And naturally, I told myself he was with a girl.
A woman, rather. I imagined him with a woman, actually – some willowy, impeccably styled socialite who worked in a gallery in Chelsea. I imagined him taking her to a Michelin-starred restaurant by Central Park where they would talk about an art exhibit, or the last time they went to Ibiza, and how it’s lost its je ne sais quois since their last visit ten years ago – just a bunch of sophisticated, borderline douchey topics I’d never have any business participating in.
Oh yeah.
I was hardcore psyching myself out. And it sucked.
I’d never done it before, but I’d seen various girlfriends through the process. I told them that while they were being irrational, it was okay. Expected, even. Hormones went a little crazy after good sex with an attractive man, but everything would eventually settle down and fall into place.
You just have to ride it out, I said.
Now, I wished I could personally call every one of my friends I’d given that generic speech to and apologize profusely, because as I tried it on myself, I realized it didn’t do jack shit.
“Hey.”
At the sound of Julian’s voice, I jumped. Once I faced him at the kitchen counter in the office, I found him already frowning at me.
“You alright?” he asked.
“Yes,” I answered too quickly.
“You look like you just saw a ghost.”
“I’m fine,” I smiled a little more convincingly now, though still gripping my coffee tight. It was another hot day and Julian was without a jacket, wearing a black tie with a pale grey shirt that was fitted well to his delectably V-shaped torso. I curled my bottom lip against my tongue.
I hadn’t seen him fully naked yet.
That thought crossed my mind just as he leaned in to grab something behind me. My eyelids were heavy for the second that I breathed his intoxicating scent. Soap and skin. It was all natural, but bottled and sold, it would make millions.
“You spilled on yourself,” Julian said, using the napkin he’d grabbed to wipe away the coffee streaming down my arm.
I blinked down at myself.
“Oh. I didn’t realize,” I murmured, blushing when I caught Colin’
s curious eye as he passed. Shit. I wasn’t sure what we looked like just now, and I wished I knew exactly why I felt so thrown off – like I’d completely forgotten how to act around Julian.
God, Sara. A part of me had really thought I could just “bang it out” with this man and carry on. The rest of me was laughing at that part now, especially as Julian gave that sexy nod to indicate “my office.”
My heartbeat quickened as I followed him out of the kitchen and headed for the stairs.
“So, I know you’re probably prepared to meet with the Roths in a few hours, but I should let you know they postponed our meeting till six tonight.”
The news was surprising enough that I somewhat snapped out of my fog.
“Really?” I made a face. But when we looked at each other, we both laughed. “Actually, yeah. That sounds about right.”
“It does, doesn’t it? Though I should’ve told you to save your initial surprise for the location he chose.”
“Oh no. Where did he choose?” I asked, watching Julian kind of shake his head to himself, rubbing his jaw as he grinned. Can you cool it? With the sexiness? Seriously. I was already getting nervous and hot, and that was before he spoke his next few words.