Discipline

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I swallowed the lump of guilt in my throat. “It looks the opposite way but we don’t… have much money. My dad’s been laid off by two different companies in the past four years.”

“Damn. Can your mom go back to work?”

I shook my head adamantly. “She would rather die than let people see her go back to work or downsize her life to something affordable.” I flicked a tortilla chip off the bar top. “She’s obsessed with being some figure of social grace in Woodhill. No one even knows my dad is unemployed. He still leaves and goes into the city every day like he’s going to work, but he’s really just visiting his brother to pass time.”

Though I wasn’t looking at her, I could feel Em staring, unblinking. “Holy shit, Nina, I didn’t know. I’m sorry. Can’t you just… sell things? You guys have assets right? Doesn’t your brother drive a BMW?” She smacked her forehead. “Didn’t he just get into freakin’ Brown? What’s the tuition like there?”

“His car is leased and the tuition is… including room and board, probably around fifty thousand dollars a year.”

“Well. Good thing you dropped out of college.”

I cringed. “Not before wasting fifteen thousand dollars on one semester.” Rather than let me go undeclared for a few semesters at a community college, Mom had me enroll in a fairly name brand art school to study Art Conservation, a major that neither of us had heard of. It simply gained points for sounding “classy” to Mom. “Yeah, my mom isn’t going to sell anything. She’s convinced that we’ll be out of this hole soon and we’ll be millionaires because of the yoga spa thing.” I winced. “And because of Ben. When she got drunk at my cousin’s wedding last year, she told me that she was thankful to ‘have a future billionaire in the family.’”

“Ew, what? He’s not family.”

“She likes to think so. That if I get married to him he’ll support me and them too, which he was kind of already doing. She used to always tell him that she’d have married him herself if she were twenty years younger, but she’s ‘glad that there’s a reason for us to be close now.’” Em’s face of horror spurred me to go on. “Mm-hm. And you know they talk on the phone all the time, right? It can go on for thirty, forty minutes. She calls him to ask what he’d like her to cook and bring over, and he’ll be all flirtatious with her because he knows how much she loves it. She actually calls her friends after hanging up with Ben to tell them what Ben just said, because she’s made him into this godly figure among the housewives in Woodhill.” I shuddered at the memories of it all. “And now I’m going to vomit.”

Em stuck her tongue out. “Yeah, let’s go to the bathroom. I’ll vom with you.”

“See?” I managed a laugh. “I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if they’ve talked since the breakup. The only reason I’m leaning towards no is because he probably would’ve told her about proposing and if she found out that I turned down that ring, she would’ve already found me and beat my ass into the ground.”

Em massaged her temples. “I’m sorry I said anything. Keep it from her for as long as you want.”

“Except Jake’s graduation is coming up and now I have to go home.”

“It would be a dick move to bail like you did with his lacrosse finals, right?”

“They’d murder me. My mom throws massive parties for these kinds of occasions. Full-blown tents in the yard and catering,” I said, a little embarrassed by Em’s astonishment. We never talk much about my family or Woodhill, mostly because I never want to.

“Shit. That sounds crazy expensive.”

“It is. But my mom needs an excuse to invite the whole town over so she can dress us all up and remind everyone that we have nice things. Nice things and tons of debt.”

A frown formed between Em’s dark brows as she doodled on a dollar bill. “God. I didn’t know any of this about your family, Nina. And your mom’s cool with you waitressing here like a plebe?”

I laughed. “The waitressing thing is a secret from everyone. Especially since I need it for the money.” I wrinkled my nose, feeling a little pang of guilt. “My mom grew up kind of poor and her family got made fun of a lot. Apparently she’d always tell everyone that a hot rich guy with a six-pack would one day sweep her off her feet. And that once she had kids, they’d have presents for every Christmas and every birthday and that she’d spoil the snot out of them… which she definitely did.” I couldn’t help laughing as I thought about the pink, three-tiered cake I had for my sixth birthday, as well as the gypsy horse Mom had rented for the party. Though it wasn’t as lavish as my sweet sixteen, which she had a Midtown restaurant shut down for, arranging party buses to transport all my friends to and from the city. Even then, I’d found it excessive, though my teenaged self certainly didn’t complain. “My childhood memories do actually look like a picture book.”

“So her dream came true then!” Em said brightly before making a face. “Well. Before… your dad got laid off,” she added with a grimace.

“Yeah. Though he definitely never had abs. He and my mom fight a lot about him not going to the gym.”

“Well, that’s a legitimate health thing,” Em pointed out, ever the gym rat.

“But she’s okay with him smoking.”

Em stuck her lower lip out. “Damn. No wonder your mom and Ben get along so well. They’re obsessed with appearances.”

I nodded darkly just as Harry returned to the bar. “I can’t anymore,” he said. Em and I glanced over at Kelsey, who was smiling to herself while texting madly.

“Well, whatever you did, you gave her something to write home about,” Em said, awed as she watched the speed of Kelsey’s fingers. Harry scratched his head.

“All I did was talk about work.”

“That’s a story to her,” Em said, laughing when I smacked her on the shoulder. “What? She just needs to get laid, that’s all. Maybe one of your brothers’ friends hasn’t lost his virginity yet.”

“Em! Too mean,” I scolded.