Discipline

“What? How could you even say that, Kelsey?”

“You just let me talk about him all those times? You just let me keep going? I knew it. You love watching me embarrass myself, you actually fucking love it. You just let me talk about how fucking gorgeous he is and how all I want is for him to check me out and this whole time you were seeing him?” She laughed bitterly. “Oh my God, what the hell am I talking about — you were obviously fucking him too right? Of course you were, you two were practically having sex in the goddamned kitchen when I walked in on — ”

She suddenly stopped, and even in the night, I was able to see the color drain from her face, my hands reaching out for her for fear that she might suddenly faint. “What, Kelsey? What is it?”

“Oh my God, it was you, not Cara.” Her eyes darted wildly before landing back on my face. My heart actually felt a twist when she slapped my hand away from her. “You slut, you had sex with Mr. Cole in Woodhill?”

I stared at her, my jaw dropped. Replacing my worry for her was a sudden, furious anger, but my tongue couldn’t form the words to express it.

“Oh my God, when did this even start?” Her feet started up again, pacing away from me, her hands in her hair as she kept spewing curses, her yell dwindling into a somewhat crazed mutter. “I swear to God, I will throw up if I hear that you were having sex with him since high school, not that it would even surprise me considering how slutty you act whenever you hang out with Adriana and the rest of the — ”

“Kelsey, listen to yourself, you’re not even making sense!” My heart pounded as I followed her. “For starters, Aaron and I started seeing each other this summer, after the breakup. And you really need to stop throwing the word slut around like you’re Ben or something — I am seeing one person and sleeping with one person. That doesn’t make me a slut!”

“He’s using you for sex.” Kelsey kept her pace, sneering over her shoulder. “What else would it be? He sees you as this little fangirl who’ll give him whatever he wants. And that makes you a slut.”

Fire burned hot in my cheeks. “You’ve got to be kidding me, Kelsey. If you want to know the truth, that’s the way Ben treated me. It is not the way Aaron treats me.”

She stopped in her tracks, cooing mockingly. “How does he treat you then, Nina? Like there’s something special just about you?”

I glared at her. “Yes.”

“That’s precious. And let me guess, when you were his student, he was already in love with you. While all the girls were fantasizing about him in class, he was fantasizing about you.”

I swallowed, remembering Aaron’s confession about me, the pen tapping, the fantasies I’d made him to admit to. My lack of an answer had actually made Kelsey pause for a second, squinting at me as if considering the possibility herself. That Aaron had noticed me while I was still his student.

The fact that she had stopped challenging me after that scared me. Going completely silent, she’d called a car to take her all the way back to Woodhill, sitting on the edge of the sidewalk and ignoring me until it arrived. Once she was gone, I’d trudged back to the house. Exhausted, I returned to see the girls, Mike and Aaron waiting for me on the stairs.

I whispered something to Em before going to bed that night, and though I lay rigid in his arms, I told Aaron that I’d make sure Kelsey kept quiet despite the fact that I wasn’t sure if I’d really be able to. Kissing my head, he told me to relax for the night, that we’d figure things out in the morning.

But once he fell asleep, I had Em drive me home.

By the time I got back, Kelsey’s sandals were already kicked off by the front door. But she hadn’t come out of her room since, despite audibly rustling about throughout the afternoon, pushing hangers in her closet as her phone dinged with a text message every ten to fifteen minutes.

Since by early evening she still hadn’t come out of her room, I finally knocked on her door.

“Kelsey, I just want to ask one thing of you. Please open the door.”

I heard her pause for a few seconds and then heave a sigh. “Alright,” she mumbled, though she took nearly a minute to

shuffle over the door. “What?” She cocked an eyebrow when she opened it.

I blinked. “Listen, Kels… I know you’re angry at me right now but I want you to know that all those things you accused me of aren’t true. I’ve never made fun of you and I’d never take pleasure in your humiliation. I’ve always had your back and right now, all I ask is for you to have mine. And Aaron’s. Please don’t tell anyone in Woodhill about us. It’s over, anyway. I just want to protect him. So please, Kelsey. Don’t tell.”

She stared at me blankly, her eyes fluttering once her phone dinged again. Instinctively, I glanced down at it. She pulled the screen away from me, hiding it behind her back, shooting daggers at me for even looking. Shit. I couldn’t shake the feeling that she’d already told the entire town.

“Does Woodhill already know?” I asked warily. Kelsey promptly snapped at me.

“No.”

“Are you going to tell them?”

“No.”

I let go of a breath, too relieved to care about the door slamming in my face.

CHAPTER 18

I crossed the street to the side where the sun cascaded down. I needed the warmth and brightness on this particular day. That morning, I’d ignored yet another one of Aaron’s calls. This time, I didn’t even listen to the voicemail. I’d simply deleted it and ignored the warning that my battery was close to zero. If my phone died for the day, so be it. I wouldn’t have to anticipate texts from Aaron that I’d only force myself to delete.