“Fuck. Helen.” He growled against her throat, opening up her belt, unzipping her jeans. And then looking her deep in the eyes, he lifted his hand, spit on his fingers and slid them between her legs.
It was the most rock-and-roll thing she’d seen all night. And there’d been a lot of rock and roll.
“Fuck me,” she said, her hand around his cock, his fingers between her legs
“No condom.” He pressed his head against hers, his fingers making easy work of her.
“I’m on the pill.”
“I’m clean.”
He yanked her off the sink, turned her and she bent over the sink, kicking her legs out as wide as she could with the denim around her knees.
Without warning he was deep inside of her with a thrust she felt in the back of her throat. She had to brace herself against the mirror, her hands spread wide. She felt his fingertips digging into her hips so hard she’d have bruises. Her hair flopped over her face and she was making an animal noise in back of her throat. The orgasm came after her with teeth and nails, and it was going to be the kind of pleasure that hurt and she had never experienced it before.
It was the kind of pleasure in Micah’s songs and now it was hers.
She looked up and caught his face in the mirror. The way he was watching her, like she was the only thing in this world that mattered, and she was spellbound.
Helpless.
She broke into a million pieces right in front of his eyes. His fingers between her legs. She was lost and found and lost again, and it was the fucking best.
He yanked her up by her shoulder, finding some leverage that he liked and pounded into her while she watched it all in the mirror. Who was that couple? That felt so much? That looked so good?
Us.
“I love you,” she said. His eyes flew to hers for one breathless second. Like jumping off a cliff, and then the orgasm had him in its teeth, too. And he wrapped his arms around her chest, heaving himself into her.
“Fuck,” he said. Again and again. Fuck and Helen. And I can’t stop.
And then it was over. And they were breathing hard in a tiny bathroom backstage in Madison Square Garden.
And she’d told him she loved him.
And he wasn’t looking her in the eye anymore.
“Are you okay?” he asked, carefully stepping away from her. She felt the ooze of his come between her legs and grabbed toilet paper to try and clean herself up.
“Fine,” she said with a smile. “Really…good.”
“That was…” He blew out a breath, pushing his hair back. “Intense.”
“I’m sorry. What I said…”
“It’s okay.” His fake heartbreaker grin made an appearance. “It happens. We got carried away.”
She stilled. Carried away? Is that what he thought? A month of nightly phone calls? Everything they’d shared. Embarrassment rolled through her in a prickly hot wave. How had she been so wrong?
She pulled up her pants and did up the belt, and he put his fingers on her chin, lifting her face to see him. “I need to tell you something,” he said. “It’s about the new album.”
The new album? Jesus, was it so important she listen to the damn thing?
There was a pounding on the door.
“Micah!” Alex shouted. “Ten thousand people are screaming our names. We gotta go.”
“You need to go,” she said, patting his shoulder. “We’ll talk later.”
Micah threw open the door and was gone. Whisked out of the darkness of backstage back into the blinding spotlight and she did a walk of shame backstage in Madison Square Garden. It was crowded now. All those people in the halls had made it into the wings and were taking selfies and singing along, and she felt too raw to stand there with strangers.
She found Ivan standing near the door, his arms over his chest, looking terrifying. But also kind of endearing. She was glad he was around to keep Micah safe.
“Can you take me back to my parents?” she shouted and he nodded and led her back through the concrete hallways through the big doors into the sweaty screaming darkness filled with thousands of Band of Outlaws fans.
She was sore between her legs. And a little in her heart. That would get worse, she knew it. There was heartbreak coming but it wasn’t here yet.
“Hey!” Mom said when Helen ducked up under the barricade to stand next to them again. “You okay?” she shouted.
“Fine!” she shouted back and hoped her parents couldn’t smell sex on her.
“This is a new song off the album. It’s my favorite song.” Micah looked out at the crowd.
He was inside me, she thought. I told him I loved him and he asked me if I was all right and I think I might have made a fool of myself.