“No. We’re supposed to be a family, Shannon. Family doesn’t lie to one another. I’m done.”
“What?” Her voice cracks.
“I said, I’m done. I love you, more than my own life, but you lied to me. I asked you if there was anything going on I should know about. You said no. You downright fucking lied to me.”
His footsteps echo off the floor, the slamming of his bedroom door mixing with Shannon’s sobs. My knees shake and as they give out, Sorina wraps her arms around my waist.
“Mom,” she sobs. “Mom, stand up.”
“Let me go, Sorina,” I breathe.
“No. Stay with me, Mom. Please.”
“Let go, Sori. Please.”
Samuel pulls her away and I sink to the floor. Tears finally breakthrough, running down my face. Blake kneels in front of me as sobs rack my body. He grips his knees. If he touches me, I might kill him.
God, everything hurts.
“Carmen, James, Teresa . . . you all need to go. Let us take care of this,” Sammi whispers from somewhere off to my left.
“No, we’re staying with my son and Lily,” James says forcefully.
“Dad,” Blake chokes through his tears. “Just go.”
“Son . . .”
“Go.”
When I left a year ago, I wanted nothing more than to come back to him. To be a family with him and Sorina and have all the things denied to me since childhood. All my fears have come crashing down on me, and my lungs won’t let the air get through. The tears pool on my lips.
Deep down, I’ve always known I was never good enough to hold him. I’ve known it from the first moment he kissed me. Now, Maria is giving him the one thing I never will— a child of his own, one of his flesh and blood. Sorina is heaven-sent, but it’s not like creating a child.
Blake cups my face, and I slap his hands away, scrambling to my feet. A shotgun blast to the chest would feel better than this. He stands, moving toward me as my feet shuffle back.
“Lily, please,” he cries.
I take a deep breath, pulling the pain inside and swallowing the lump in my throat. “I’m moving into the spare room. When this assignment is over, I’ll be gone. You can raise your new family in peace.”
“Lily, no. You’re my family.”
“No,” I say walking around him toward the bedroom. “I know you. Your past won’t let you abandon your child, and I can’t be with you and watch you raise a baby with . . . her. It’s over, Blake.”
“Mom, please. I need you,” Sorina yells.
“You’re old enough to make your own choices, Sori. When the time comes, you decide. I’m sorry, sweetheart, but I can’t do this.”
As the sobs threaten to overtake me again, I dart into the bedroom and slam the door, pressing my back against it. Something dark snaps inside me, as I sink to the floor, my body giving out, and my mind giving up.
†††
~Dresden~
Everything from the bedroom fits into four duffle bags. Carrying them into the main room, Blake and Shannon stand with the rest of the team and that evil bitch, talking in low voices. Lily is nowhere to be found. She needs time to herself, but tomorrow, we’re talking about this, even if she doesn’t want to.
How could Blake be so fucking stupid? And Shannon . . .
I drop my bags by the table, startling them. They spin in my direction, my arms crossing over my chest. Shannon’s face is soaked with tears, and I want so badly to hold her, but can’t. Lying to me was the biggest mistake she ever could’ve made.