“Yes.” Her voice is low and questioning.
“Can I still trust you like that? To help me do something without telling anyone. I mean no one. Not Caleb, and especially not Blake or Dresden.”
She runs one hand through her hair, tapping her other hand on the desk. “Is it something dangerous like last time?”
Swallowing the lump in my throat, I nod.
“I don’t want you to get hurt, Lily.”
“I need to know I can trust you, Boa. The way I used to.”
She nods, hard determination seeping into her eyes. “You can trust me. Always.”
I hand her the paper and let her read it over. No one’s ever read mine and Dresden’s assignments. These are between Bates and us. He organizes the pickup and dropoff, along with the crew who steps in after we do the job. Other than that, we’ve done these on our own. This time . . . it’s on my own.
“You and Dresden have to leave? The order for this is a month away.”
“In a month, Shannon will almost be four months pregnant, Boa. Dresden needs to be here with her. I can’t risk his life this time. He has a family to take care of.”
She gasps, finally putting two and two together. “You’re going alone. No, Lily. You’ll get killed.”
“Naja. It means true cobra. If you and Caleb are right, then this is Jax and I need to do this alone.”
She grinds her teeth together. “How are you going to keep them all from knowing? A helicopter isn’t easy to hide, Lily.”
“Well, as much as I don’t want to, drugging them is the only way. The pickup is at 10 p.m. I’ll have Teresa schedule a late dinner and give each of them a dose of sleeping meds. It’ll keep them out for a few hours. Everyone but Shannon. You’ll have to deal with her.”
“This bloody sucks, mate. I’ll be lucky if they don’t kill me this time.”
“Shannon will be able to back up that I forced you into this. Are you in?”
She holds her fist up toward me and I bump it with mine. “I’m in.”
30 days. I’m going to get my answers in 30 days.
†††
Blake’s reflection catches my attention as I towel dry my hair in front of the bathroom sink. His muscles ripple as he stretches out in bed, bringing his hands behind his head. My mouth goes dry, desire pulling at my nerves. We’ve been distant from each other since Caleb gave me that damn file, and it blows.
Every time Blake and I take a step forward, some stupid shit pops up and we take five steps back. It’s time to get the ball rolling on ending all this so we can go back to his apartment and have a normal life. He’s itching to go back to work, even though he doesn’t come out and say so. Blake’s a hardworking man, and he’s been holed up in hiding for too damn long.
A smile tugs at my lips, my eyes drinking him in as I move next to the bed. His eyes flutter open at my touch. I trail my fingers up his stomach and chest, cupping the side of his face. He hums, leaning into my hand. I try hard to keep my face blank, but my lips turn down slightly, knowing that in a month’s time, I’m going to do something that could rip us apart . . . again.
Mentally, I shake myself. No. Dresden needs to be here with Shannon and the others. Jax is a no-brainer. He may have taught me, but at some point, I surpassed him in skill. He knows it, too. It’s why he and I never sparred.
“Your eyes are so distant lately,” he murmurs, grabbing my wrist and yanking me onto the bed. He rolls to his side, hovering over me with my legs draped over his hip.
“I’ve got a lot on my mind, Blake.”
“Let’s see if I can help ease that.”
He leans down and kisses me, running his tongue along my lower lip before nipping at it. My heart beats rapidly, his right hand fisting in my hair while his other one gently grips my waist. He trails his lips across my cheek, sucking on my earlobe, along my jaw and down my throat.
“Blake,” I moan, running my fingers through his hair.
“Hey, baby,” he whispers, working his way down my neck and across my collarbone.
“Yeah?”