~Sammi~
The shipment of Midazolam is scheduled to be here within the next 3-5 days. My contacts in the pharmaceutical industry come in handy from time to time. I ordered tablets and liquid form. Lily and I seriously need to discuss a plan to dose everyone, because I’m not getting my ass beat by Dresden . . . or Vlad.
A few months ago, my relationship with Vlad would’ve reassured me of not fearing him. But since everything went down and we lost Jameson, he hardly even looks in my direction. When he does, I’m almost positive he’s contemplating killing me in my sleep. We still share a room, but he’s slept on the futon, while I’m alone in the bed.
I don’t regret doing everything to save my daughter. But hurting the man I fell in love with, and the people I hold as family is the single worst thing I’ve ever done in my life. Lily deserves better from me. She’s risked her life repeatedly for all of us, and I repaid her with betrayal. Helping her accomplish this mission is the least I can do to win back her trust, and show her how sorry I am.
I scroll through the shipment status email one more time before closing everything out. Normally, I’d delete any and all traces of this, but to double guard Lily’s ass in the event our team comes snooping, I encrypted every mouse click with a series of passwords. It recycles the same three every time you try to click to open anything on my hard drive. Our team is intelligent, but they’re not hackers. No one’s getting through the encryption.
A gruff cough startles me and I jump, turning quickly toward the sound. Vlad stands a few feet behind me, his arms crossed over his massive chest and a look on his face that screams, Go fuck yourself.
What in the vag? This should be interesting.
“Did you need something?” I ask, spinning back toward my monitor to finish closing the screens down.
I know he’s staring at the back of my head. It’s like a weird energy pulse and it’s uncomfortable coming from him.
“I’d appreciate it if you faced me when I talk to you.” His voice is low and controlled. Two things that, with Vlad, are worrisome to say the least.
My shoulders slump forward as I sigh and spin my chair toward him. I’m surprised that his look softens just a fraction when our eyes meet, but there’s no denying the fury in those irises.
“What do you want to say, mate? At this point, I’d be ‘ight if ya just kicked my ass and got it over with.” I shrug, unable to put anymore movement into caring about what happens next.
“I don’t want to kick your ass, Sammi. God, you’re fucking stupid sometimes.” His lips pull back in a grimace and I’m just blankly staring at him . . . confused.
Wait . . . what?
He takes a determined step forward but stops abruptly as if he’s walked into an imaginary wall. “I love you. But, god, I hate you right now. You lied to me. You lied to the team. This team is supposed to trust each other. Between Hayato, and now this shit with Jax . . . you being a fucking . . . rat, just makes it that much harder for us all.”
The tears sting my eyes. “I know, and I’— “
“No! You don’t know. Every time we catch someone in a lie, the rest of us trust each other a little less. I trust Rhett and Dres a little less. Lily trusts us ALL a little less. What the hell does this team have if we can’t trust each other?”
He’s right. As much as I want to say I did this for my daughter and they should understand, the effect is still the same. Every time we lie, we fall a little further apart. At a time when we need to stand closer together.
“I love you, Vlad. I’m not going to apologize again, because it doesn’t change anything. You’re right. This team, partly because of my actions, is falling apart when we can’t afford to. All I can tell you is I’ll wait for as long as it takes to make this right again. To make us right.”
The tears finally slide slowly down my cheeks and before I can process it, Vlad is across the room, and his lips slam into mine as he sinks to his knees to match my sitting height.
After a moment he rests his forehead on mine and sighs. “It’s going to take a while. But eventually, we’ll be okay.”
†††
~Lily~
12 days left.
“We found at least twelve different dresses that would look good. Picking one is the hard part . . . for you at least,” Shannon says as she leans back in her chair, hand rubbing small circles across the front of her growing belly.
I can’t help but stare. I never understood the saying that pregnant women “glow”, but I think after watching Shannon’s pregnancy progress, I get it. She does look brighter. Happier. Though, there’s no denying the exhaustion in her eyes.
She, Sorina, and Teresa have spent the first 25 minutes of dinner rambling on about wedding planning. I’m trying my best to seem enthused, but the nagging feeling of what I’m about to do in 12 days is making it more difficult than I imagined.
Blake’s hardly said two words since we sat down to eat. He thinks I don’t notice the subtle glances between him, Dres, and Vlad— but I do. They’re trying to figure out what I’m up to, and they’re failing at it. Someone would’ve cussed me out and confronted me already if they even had a working theory.
It’s almost cute— the three of them trying to play Sherlock Holmes behind my back.
“What if I don’t want to wear a dress?”