The Spinster (Emerson Pass Historicals 2)

“Even though I’ve brought unwelcome news?”

“My parents always say the truth is what matters most. I’ve made decisions based on what I thought to be true. It will take some time to recover from that and to examine exactly what it is in me that allowed that to happen.?

?

“You’re not angry with me?”

“I was for a second, but it makes no sense to kill the messenger. You didn’t do anything wrong. Other than read letters not written to you.” I smiled to let him know I was teasing. “But seriously, you must stop all this nonsense about being in love with me. People can’t fall in love over words.”

“I disagree.” He gave me a slight smile. “You’re not inside my mind.”

“Is it all sunshine and roses inside there?”

“It’s actually a bit cloudy. I’m roaming around half-blind, unsure where I’m going or what I’m doing. But there’s one thing I know for sure, and that is how I feel about you.”

I turned away from his gaze, shy. Could it be possible? Was there a chance I could feel the same way?

“No one’s loved me for a very long time,” Phillip said. “But I remember what it was like to bask in the glow of my mother’s love. I know it’s the only thing worth fighting for. It’s true that I don’t have much in the way of worldly goods, but my heart’s pure. I’m going to work like the dickens to make a life I could offer to you.”

“I don’t care two figs about money,” I said. “My father’s set it up for me to have a comfortable life whether I marry or not.”

“The success would not be for you but for myself. A man has to feel worthy of the extraordinary woman who chooses him.”

“I see.”

“If you’ll allow me to spend time with you over the winter and perhaps into the spring, you’ll know by then if there’s the slightest chance of falling in love with me. My intention is to win your heart.”

“You must believe there is or you wouldn’t have come here.” I chuckled to myself. The whiskey had warmed me and loosened my inhibitions. “Which shows an arrogance and boldness that reminds me of my father.”

“All my life I’ve only had myself to rely on. Not many things have gone my way, which makes it easier to come for what I want. Nothing good ever came from timidity.”

“Well, I shall sleep on all of this and we can talk tomorrow. In the meantime, I need to go to bed or I’ll turn into a pumpkin by morning.” I needed out of there. To think through all that he’d told me tonight. And to keep myself from giving him too much hope. I didn’t know him. I wasn’t going to make the same mistake I’d made in the past. Be guarded and wary, I told myself. Even though he seems like the most sincere man in the world.

He rose to his feet and offered his hand. I allowed him to help me up out of the chair even though I was perfectly capable of doing so myself. A tingle ran up my arm. We stood there, staring into each other’s eyes for at least three seconds before I removed my hand from his. “Good night, Phillip.”

“Good night, Josephine.”

I walked out of the room knowing that his gaze traveled with me. When I got to the doorway, I didn’t look back for fear that if I did, I might run straight into his arms.

The next morning, it was only Papa, Mama, and my younger sisters at breakfast. Flynn had taken Phillip and Cymbeline into town to help clean up after the festival. There was no sign of Theo, but he must have decided to sleep in after our late night. All of which gave me the perfect opportunity to tell Mama and Papa about Walter.

Surprisingly, I’d slept well. After I’d parted from Phillip the night before, I’d been so weary from the emotions of the day that I’d fallen immediately asleep. I was refreshed in the morning. Strangely, lighter too, as if a burden had been lifted. This was not the reaction I thought I’d have upon learning my love was not my love after all.

I waited for Fiona to take the little girls upstairs for some playtime before addressing Mama and Papa. He was reading the paper and sipping another cup of coffee. Mama was nibbling on one of Lizzie’s biscuits while taking surreptitious glances in my direction.

“You’re awfully quiet, Jo,” Mama said. “Is everything all right?”

Papa put down his paper and fixed his gaze upon me as well.

“I’m fine.” My voice wobbled, which did nothing to convince them. “It’s just that I’ve learned some things from Phillip. About Walter.”

“About how he died?” Mama asked. “Did you get the answers you were seeking?”

“Not exactly.” Again with the shaking voice. I swallowed and took in a deep breath. “He wasn’t who I thought he was. There were other women. Five, to be exact, from whom he received letters. They all thought he would come home to marry them.”

“I don’t understand,” Papa said. “How could you all think he was to marry you?”

“Because he told us all the same thing,” I said. “We’re all from wealthy families. Phillip said he was interested in marrying someone with money to secure his future. I guess because he grew up all alone, his main goal in life was to have wealth and lead a life of leisure.”