“Money isn’t everything,” Josephine said.
“Spoken from one who’s never wanted for anything.”
She stiffened and turned away.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I didn’t mean it to sound unkind.”
“It’s true. I’ve had everything. Every creature comfort. I must seem spoiled to you.”
“Not at all.” I struggled to find the right words. “You’re gracious and hardworking. I’m not good enough for you. That’s the trouble.”
“A confident man believes in himself and his capacity to make his dreams come true. You believe in your talent and drive, don’t you?”
“Yes, I do. But not everything is up to me. There are circumstances out of my control.”
“And you think I don’t understand that?” Her v
oice was soft as a feather but as brittle as the ice that clung to the branches of the trees.
I spoke the next words slowly, knowing they could make her angrier. “I think you’ve had help. And I’ve had little. That’s all. I’m starting with nothing. I’m frightened to fail you.”
She jerked her head up to look at me. “The only way you’ll fail me is by being timid. If I’m the one you want, then you must do whatever it takes to make me yours.”
“My desire isn’t in question. I want to be part of your family. But I have to earn it.”
Her chin lifted slightly as she stared me down. “Is it me you want or my family?”
I flinched, surprised. Did she believe it was only her family that attracted me? Could she possibly think it was the money, like stupid Walter? “You, Jo, above anything else. Without question your family’s an additional blessing. I’d be lying if I said the last few weeks hadn’t been the best of my life, in part because of the way they’ve welcomed me into your home. I love pretending to be a big brother to your sisters. The camaraderie with the twins is the type of friendship any man craves. Your father’s attention and advice are an answer to prayer. But without you, Jo, they’re just a family I care about very much. It’s you I want. Don’t ever mistake that.” I reached out to her, taking both her hands. “I know you’re doubtful because of what happened with Walter. I can’t blame you for being so.” I tapped my chest. “But me? I traveled across the country on my last dime to see if what I thought was true.” I hesitated, unsure what to say next. “It’s just that I want the very best for you, and I’m not sure I can give it to you.”
“This feeling I have for you—if you were to betray me—I would be devastated. This isn’t like with Walter. I made him into something he wasn’t. You, though, you’re real and true. I’m in love with you, Phillip Baker.”
“You are?”
“Yes. I was convinced I’d hardened myself to love until you came to me with your big heart. If you walk away because you’re poor, my heart will be broken.”
Her words melted me. “What do you want me to do?”
“Ask Papa for permission to marry me. Allow him to help you come up with a plan for your business or some other kind of employment. Take a loan from him if you have to. Don’t let your pride ruin this chance we have for happiness.”
“All I’ve had is my pride,” I said, smiling.
“Now you have me. And the rest of my loud, interfering, maddening family. I’d rather live with you in a shack than in a mansion with anyone else.”
I kissed her again, my heart full.
“Are you sure this is what you want?” I asked.
“I’m sure.”
“I’ll ask your father for permission,” I said. “If he says yes, you will too?”
“Phillip, yes. I’ve said it already.”
“All right, all right,” I said, laughing at the impatience in her tone. “You must remember, I’m a man and therefore slower than you.”
“Isn’t that the truth?” Her face broke into a smile. She looked eight years old for a moment, delighted by a gift.
“What if he says no? What do I do then?”