ChapterFive
Ashley fell back into her routine at college as January became February, making sure she finished strong, despite how distracted she was. She was between classes now, walking across campus as the snow flurries started again, her breath coming out in smoke.
Although, in some ways, she was more focused, because she wasn’t going out on the weekends anymore getting drunk with friends who were more like acquaintances, really.
Ashley’s weekends were much more fulfilling these last few months.
And it wasn’t just the hours she spent in Carla’s bed. It was the dinners they cooked together. The conversations they had. The lazy Sunday mornings spent on the couch with coffee and Netflix.
So, maybe distracted was the wrong word. She was thoroughly preoccupied, mentally, and physically, with Carla Lawless.
And if it ended or if their feelings started to fade in the summer, when they were free to see each other, away from college, no longer student and teacher, Ashley would just have to figure out a way to move on. Because she was already too far gone to even think about protecting herself.
That night when Carla had said she was falling for her was weeks ago now, and even though they saw each other every weekend, nothing like that was ever said again.
Ashley had foolishly thought that maybe that was the opening that they’d needed, to finally start thinking about what they were really doing and whether or not they had a future together out in the real world.
So, Ashley tried to stay in the present, to just enjoy the time she had with Carla, but there was always that nagging voice in the back of her head, warning her that this was going to end in disaster, that Carla would never take her seriously because of their age difference.
At least, they were still seeing each other, because after Ashley spontaneously decided to confess how they’d really met, that it wasn’t accidental at all, there had been long seconds where Ashley feared the worst. That they were done. That Carla never wanted to see her again.
But Carla hadn’t made a big deal of it, and Ashley still wondered about that. It gave her hope. More than likely false hope. But still, it was something to cling on to as the weeks went by, and she knew their relationship was going to change, one way or another.
Either they would start dating, like normal people, or they’d realize that what they’d had was nothing more than an adrenaline-fueled affair that was only meant to be temporary.
And Ashley had no idea which way it was going to go.