Something Wilder

“We have to get rolling.” She tugged on her stiff jeans before pulling her shirt off and tossing that to him as well. He stared at her breasts just… right there, in front of him, like it hadn’t been a decade since he saw them last.

She reached for her bra, now dry on the rock. “Put your eyes back in your head,” she said, laughing. “It’s supposed to hit eighty-five today, and we have nearly four miles to hike.”

“Four miles is an hour, maybe two if we stop for water,” he told her.

“Not down here it isn’t.”

He pulled his shirt on and was immediately hit with a desire so heady it made his eyes roll closed. The shirt smelled like Lily. It was still warm from her body. Pulling it down over his torso, Leo looked to where she sat on the rocks, tugging her socks and shoes on.

But I guess if you need something more permanent than that, then… don’t kiss me. What a joke. Like he would have been able to stop himself.

There was so much he hadn’t said, and in the light of day he was glad. Things like how he was considering giving up his life as he knew it to be near her. Besides, his life was different now; he wasn’t tethered to New York in the way he’d been since his mother died. He was still figuring out how it would look, what he could even do for a living if he moved to be near her. He was organized and worked hard; in truth, if he wanted a job and not a career, Leo could probably find something relatively easily. He wouldn’t mourn leaving the office life behind; continually trying to outsmart some of the best hackers in the world had been a fun challenge at first—but in the last few years, the reality that even if he created the perfect code he would have to write a new one the very next week meant the job had lost some of the early glow. Still, even that had allowed him some creativity; if he got the promotion, he would be in meetings ten hours a day. And the point of moving would be to be near Lily, he reminded himself. A job was a means to an end, a means to make ends meet. A life was what he could have with her.

He shook some dirt off a sock, and then paused. Slow down, Leo. Even Walter would probably tell him to cool it. Lily was quickly and methodically packing up everything while Leo stood there slowly pulling his clothes on and thinking soft-focus thoughts about what their forever could look like. He didn’t even know if she’d want that.

As if on cue, she asked, “Can you pack up the tent?” with only a thin layer of exasperation.

In minutes, he had it disassembled and stored. Lily spread the map out on a rock. “There’ll be some pretty tricky bouldering here,” she said, pointing to a section about a mile away, “but that’s not what I’m worried about.”

He waited, but she didn’t elaborate. Finally: “What are you worried about?”

Lily took a deep breath through her nose, staring at the map. “I’m worried the cabin isn’t there anymore. It was ancient then, and that was twenty years ago. The photo is from even before that.”

“Even if the cabin has fallen down,” he said, “the stump will still be there. At least presumably, right?”

“Right, but a stump is a lot harder to find from memory than a cabin is.”

“Good point.”

They shoveled a few protein bars into their mouths, chugged down lukewarm instant coffee, and set out. Immediately, Leo understood why Lily had been in such a hurry. By 10:15, it was hot as literal hell. Dry, too, in a way that made his skin feel too tight. Upside: whenever they found a patch of shade, they could stand in it and feel like the temperature dropped at least a full ten degrees. Downside: there just wasn’t that much shade in this part of the Maze, and when they got to the part where there was, the sun would be the least of their worries. Some sections were so intricate and narrow, they could go in and die of thirst or heat stroke before they found their way back out again.

About a full hour into the slow hike—over boulders, finding narrow paths through scratchy blackbrush—Lily turned to speak over her shoulder. “Should we talk about it?”

Leo grinned at her back. She knew he wouldn’t bring it up again. Now he had to wonder if it’d taken her the entire hour to get that simple question out. “We can, sure.”

“I don’t want to hurt you,” she said outright, and his stomach rolled. Great start. “And so if what happened last night upset you at all, I want to say I’m sorry.”