“See you around, Officer Dixon.”
“Yeah,” he mumbles, and I drive off without looking back.
It’s past midnight when I get back to my apartment. I sent Ivy a text letting her know I was on the way, so I’m not surprised to see her waiting for me when I walk through the door.
“How’d it go?”
“‘Bout how you’d expect,” I tell her honestly as I kick off my shoes.
“Tattoo, piercing, or hair dye?”
I laugh and drop down next to her on the couch.
“I’d say tattoo, but unfortunately, I don’t have the money for any of them, so I’ll have to go with wine and weed.”
“Wellllll,” she drags out with a small smile. “I’ve held off getting you a birthday present. I can’t really swing for a tattoo, but what if we go to the beauty supply store tomorrow and grab some bleach and a new color? My treat.”
Ivy’s been dying my hair since sophomore year. I’d mentioned wanting to do a fun color and she offered to help. She watched like twenty YouTube tutorials, did several Google searches, and in the end, I had some chunky pink streaks that I absolutely loved.
“You don’t have to do that, V.”
She shrugs. “I want to, so you might as well be the one to pick out the color.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
“Okay.”
Today has been absolute shit, but at least it’s ending on a good note.
* * *
The next night,after Ivy dyes my hair, I move out to the balcony for some much-needed alone time. I’m sitting in my bowl chair, jar of wine in one hand and my phone in the other with my e-reader app open when I hear a rustle, a thud, and see two hands grip the bars on the balcony railing.
I startle, then freeze, and when a figure rises up over the bars, I start to scream before I notice who it is.
“What the fuck?” I yell, but Jesse just puts his index finger to his lips and shushes me with a dramatic scowl. Then he pulls himself over the rail, so he’s standing on the balcony.
I’m too confused to say anything, so I just sit back and silently watch as he takes out his phone, types, and starts playing the Mission Impossible theme song. Then he pulls down a ski mask, opens the balcony door, and shoulder rolls into my apartment.
He pops up quickly, turns the deadbolt on the front door, and in scrambles Kelley with a big cardboard box. He hands the box to Jesse, then salutes me with a wink before they both disappear down the hall.
In a matter of seconds, they’re both rushing back to the balcony.
Kelley ruffles my hair and presses a kiss to my head, then hops over the railing of our second-story apartment and lands in the grass without making a sound. Jesse steps up, ski mask still pulled down, and moves like he’s going to slap me upside the head. I bring my hand up to block him, but he fakes me out and smacks me on the other side. Instinctively, I kick my foot out, hitting his thigh and just narrowly missing his dick. I smirk and flip him off when he jumps back, cups his junk, and sticks his fucking tongue out at me— through the ski mask—like a child. I can’t hold back my laugh, and he smiles in triumph.
A split second later, Jesse launches himself over the railing and I hear a thud, two grunts, and Kelley say something that sounds like “get the fuck off.” When I hear the pattering of running footsteps disappear into the night, my curiosity gets the better of me and I inspect the house.
Walking into my room, I find the cardboard box Kelley carried in sitting on my bed.
No wrapping paper, no bow, no card.
They know better.
I open the giant box to find another box. I roll my eyes and pull it out, then open it to find, yep, a smaller box. Like nesting eggs, they’ve got six boxes stacked. Ridiculous.
When I get to the smallest box, I hear a clanking noise and raise a brow.
I open it and reach in to first pull out a set of copper measuring cups and a matching set of measuring spoons. Kelley.
Then I take out a…uh…knitted…potato, maybe?
A knitted potato…wearing a white knitted toupee?
With googly eyes stuck to it.
I study it for a second, give it a little squish, and finally give up. Jesse’s new thing is dolls. Obviously, he’s not very good at it yet.
I open our group text thread and shoot off the question that I’m certain he was waiting for.
Me:J. Wtf is this?
Jesse:*cupcake emoji*
I study it again. Huh. It does kind of look like a cupcake, I guess. If you squint, the toupee could pass for icing.
Me:I can see it.
Jesse:*kiss face emoji*
Me:Ew. In your dreams.
Ivy:*laughing face emoji*
Kelley:*clown emoji*