“When Georgia came here, she believed. But she had spirit.” Her voice is low and even. “She managed to brighten the dark corners of the Cloister. No matter what happened to her, she kept going. She never broke, even after she stopped believing the Prophet’s lies. She stayed strong. And she would have gotten away.”
“You’re lying!” I want to scratch her eyes out, to pull her tongue from her mouth. Who was she to cause me this pain? The pain that the Prophet had taken away.
“She told me about you.”
“Lying whore!” I scream and try to fight her off. “Liar, liar, liar!”
She slams me back down.
The breath is knocked out of me, and I see stars, dark ones that flicker and burst. For a moment, there’s a small sliver of clarity, as if I can see through the dark dream I’m in, but then it’s gone. And I’m still here with Chastity, who insists on saying horrible things about the blessed Prophet. She’s lying. She has to be. The Prophet is the only one who’s ever told me the truth. Maybe … maybe Chastity killed Georgia. Yes, that makes sense.
“You did it,” I spit at her.
“What?” Her eyes widen. “I did what?”
“You killed Georgia. You’re trying to throw your guilt onto the Prophet, because you are a filthy fallen creature. I know what sort of freak you are. The way you and Jez are too familiar. I know your sin. You’re a disgusting Sodomite, and I hope the Prophet gives you what you deserve. Cuts your lying tongue out of your head! Murderer!”
Something like sadness creases the skin next to her eyes, but resolve still burns in her rough hold. She keeps her voice at a harsh whisper. “That’s not true, and you know it. I would have never hurt Georgia. Think, Delilah! Remember why you came here. Fight it. Fight what he’s done to you. Remember Georgia.”
“Shut up.” I wonder if I can throw her off and run, run to the Prophet and tell him about her lying ways.
“Do you remember her laugh?”
I blink. “What?”
“The way she would laugh. It was like light through leaves, warm and sweet.”
A phantom sound plays through my mind, the warm, high notes of a carefree girl.
I clench my eyes shut when they begin to water. “No.”
“And she would smile. Even when things were bad, even when training was horrible, even when Grace came down on her for being upbeat—she would smile, as if she knew everything would be all right. And I held onto that. I still do.”
Georgia’s smile breaks through the haze, and I remember her. I remember every aching detail. Her love, her light, her warmth. And I want it back—all of it—I want that lightness back so badly, but I’ll never have it.
The Prophet’s voice whispers to me, “Chastity killed her. Chastity took that light away. Chastity is the one who wants to hurt you. I am your salvation.”
“You killed her.”
“No.” She shakes her head. “I loved her.”
“Liar!”
“Georgia talked about her little sister with the white hair and the big heart, she—”
“Shut up.” The tears burn and slip past my eyelids.
“She loved you so much and was glad you didn’t follow her lead to this horrible—”
“You’re lying.” The frosted pane of glass that separates me from the laughing, golden-haired girl begins to crack.
“I’m not, Delilah. She told me what she used to call you to cheer you up.”
“No.” The cracks grow wider, fissures of light that show me a way out of this dark pit.
She leans down and presses her lips to my ears, speaking the name that only Georgia knew. That Georgia would call me when I was down or when things were even rockier with my mother than usual. Only Georgia. The frosted glass shatters.
My tears flow without stopping, and I choke out, “Georgia.”
“She’s lying.” The Prophet’s fingers brush along my heart. “I’m the true—”
“Shut up!” I snarl. “Liar! You’re a liar. You—”
Chastity interrupts, thinking my words are meant for her. “I’m not lying. I was a brand new Spinner when I met Georgia—this was before I was sent to the Chapel. Before I tried to escape. We were friends. She was the only friend I ever had until I met Jez.” Her eyes glisten, her tears matching my own. “She loved you so much. Do you remember? She told me all about you, and she was so glad that you were too smart to fall for the lure of this place. She loved you, and I loved her like a sister.”
Her tears break through whatever tether is holding me, and I see Georgia fully in my mind. She’s there, in all her youthful glory. Radiant, happy, and smiling at me. All the air leaves my lungs, as if someone punched me hard in the gut. She’s gone. Gone. I can’t fight the truth anymore, no matter how much it shreds me to bits.