I bowed my head out of respect, though not as deeply as I had upon greeting the most powerful dragon shifter in the south. After a moment, I stepped back. “Yes, sir. Right away, sir.”
Triumph clutched me as I made my way out of the estate. Once I left the foyer, I slid into my car and sat there for a moment, glee circling my head like tiny baby dragons.
But wait . . . If Seth wanted me to be with Nathaniel, and Nathaniel was nowhere to be found, how the hell was I supposed to accomplish that?
Shit, I have to do a round of calls, don’t I?
I rested my forehead on the steering wheel. It was going to be a long night.
* * *
Searching every nook and cranny of Savannah—including some dive bars just outside of town—proved to be the easy part.
The hard part? Finding Nathaniel.
No one had seen him for the past three days. It was the same story every time—and every time I heard it; my heart shattered even more.
Defeat drove me home. Midnight draped a blanket of darkness over the town, one that even the streetlights couldn’t keep away. I dragged myself into my apartment, collapsed in my bed, and let out a sob I had been holding in since leaving the last bar. Tears flooded the blanket beneath my face. I squeaked as I tried to suck in air, cool fabric blocking my mouth and making me choke. I lifted my head to take a huge gulp and let out a heartbreaking wail, a violent shaking fit gripping my body.
As I folded over a pillow to comfort myself, I thought of the worst.
Nathaniel had left town. Nathaniel had started over somewhere new. Nathaniel had gotten drunk, fallen into a ditch, and was dead.
What was I supposed to do without him? For the first time ever, his father had approved of our union. I had no idea that would ever be an option. And now, with it so within reach, I had lost it; the possibility of us living happily ever after slipping right through my fingers like sand.
Gone—he was gone.
Possibly forever.
Wretched sobs turned into distraught sniffles. Soon, the tears slowed and my eyes eventually dried, puffing up much like my nose. I probably looked like a mess. An invisible force propelled my hand to my phone, lifting it from my nightstand.
She told me not to get involved with him, I thought. Bri had warned me. I didn’t listen. This is what I get for not listening.
Eyes red-rimmed and burning from crying, I held my phone in shaky hands, doing my best to maneuver through the right screens to get to Nathaniel’s messages. He hadn’t said a word to me. And that was fine.
I would make sure he didn’t ever say a word to me again.
The more I typed, the more my heart broke in two. How I would ever recover from this was beyond me. I was devastated—and it was starting to look like my only option left was a wolf shifter, one who had no idea how to not be aggressive.
Maybe that’s my problem. Maybe I’m not seeing things clearly.
I finished typing my message, sent it, and curled up in my bed, hoping that the darkness would soon take me. My dreams would be fitful. I might lose myself, but at least I wouldn’t be awake.
Losing Nathaniel like this was a disastrous blow. It would eventually keep me up at night, no solace to be found. I hadn’t ever slept with anyone else. Hell, I hadn’t even kissed anyone else.
Nathaniel was my one and only. He was my sun as much as he was my moon. He was the canopy of stars overhead. A light in the night, golden thread weaving with my emerald green fire—that was who he was to me.
And now he was gone.
I rested my cheek on my hands. Despite the fact that I was shivering, I didn’t want to cover myself. I wanted to suffer. Suffering would be the only way to feel anything other than forsaken depression. I didn’t want to feel anything else. I didn’t want to think about anything else.
I didn’t want to be awake anymore. I just wanted to sleep…forever.