Chapter Thirteen
Emily
July 21st – The Eve of the Wedding
Jake has been trying to talk Helen into letting him see me, but I keep saying no. I don't want anything to get in the way of us getting married tomorrow and I'm crazy enough to go along with the superstitions. It doesn't help that I haven't felt particularly well today or yesterday or all week really. I'm tired all the time, probably from running like a chicken with my head cut off.
“You guys,” I whine, laying my head on the arm rest of the couch. “I don't feel good. I can't get sick! I'm getting married tomorrow.”
“What's wrong?” Helen asks, clearly concerned.
“I'm tired. I feel like I'm going to puke and oh my god, my boobs hurt!” Without thinking about how Cherish is in the room with Helen, Kristi, and me, I gently grab one of my boobs to emphasis my point. I sit up when they all look at each other and then stare at me as if they are waiting for me to catch on to whatever they are thinking.
Three seconds is all it takes.
Oh, God.
Am I really-?
Immediately, I shut down that thought, my eyes widen with a little fear. My mouth seems to have been sewn shut, because I can't speak.
“I can run to the store if you want me to,” Cherish offers.
Gulping, I nod. With every possible thought, I panic a little as I try to ignore it. I need to stay calm until we know for sure. Then I can freak out and demand to see Jake. I won't be able to move until I've seen him. Each minute that Cherish is gone, the more anxious I get as I recall the last time I was in this situation. But then I remember that things are different this time. I'm older, and I'm about to marry the love of my life. We both want this and have essentially been trying without really trying for almost a year.
“I'm back,” Cherish calls as she enters the room once more.
“Is everything okay, Emily? You haven't spoken since she left,” Helen says.
“Yes, everything is fine.”
With a deep breath, I take the box from Cherish, go into the bathroom, do what I gotta do, and then wait.
“Are you going to stay in there until you find out?” Kristi asks from the other side of the door.
“Are y'all going to stand outside the door while I'm in here?”
“Yes,” they all chime together.
Time is almost up, so I close my eyes until I know that I should have the results.
“One, two, three,” I whisper, my eyes popping open and landing on the test.
“Well?” Cherish speaks first.
I place the test back in the box, close it, and then open the door. All three girls are standing there, searching my blank face for a clue. Instead of telling them, I rest a hand over my stomach where a little baby Benson is growing and smile. Helen squeals and is the first to wrap me in a hug before I'm passed to Kristi and then Cherish.
“Congrats, Emily. Everyone is going to be so happy to hear the news.”
Before she can finish, I start shaking my head. “No. No one is going to know for a while. I think I may wait to tell Jake until after our honeymoon and then we'll decide when to let everyone else know. So this is a secret that doesn't leave this room, okay?”
The girls nod and I'm thankful. I have a big day tomorrow, and I'm exhausted, so I excuse myself to go to bed. As I'm trying to fall asleep, I debate my decision to wait and tell Jake. Part of me wants to tell him right this second. Not only because he should know, but because of my last pregnancy ending in a miscarriage. I want him right here with me every step of the way. Then again, I want a special way to tell him. I can plan a surprise and share the news with him then. Plus, I want our honeymoon to be about us and nothing else. I want to celebrate our marriage first, and then we can celebrate the baby. But I'm not sure if I can keep quiet for that long. There's only a choice of which part of me will win on how and when to tell him.
With a peek at the clock, I know that I better get some sleep if I want to look good tomorrow. I can't believe it. In less than twenty-four hours, I will become Mrs. Jake Benson. In eight or nine days, I get to tell him that we're going to have a baby. It's finally happening for us, and I couldn't be more excited. That night, I fall asleep with a smile on my face.