It had been like that in the hallway earlier, before the ceremony. And try as he did to read her expression, to figure out if she was at least happy to see him, he couldn’t. Even her words had been sparse, the inflection carefully neutral.
And it terrified him that maybe it was too late.
Or that maybe it was never going to work at all.
But he refused to consider it. Not when the promise of how good things could actually be between them was there almost in reach.
Which was why, after sending Lily with half of their security entourage to get ice cream, he’d sat down on the bench hidden away against the church, hoping he’d get a chance to speak to Daisy alone.
It had felt like a stroke of luck when he’d looked up to see Daisy standing on the sidewalk, watching Lily drive away.
She’d looked so dejected. Her shoulders sinking down, and for a moment, he dared to hope.
Was she sorry because she thought she’d missed him?
“Daisy,” he said as he reached her and waited for her to look up again.
And when she did, it was hard to miss the surprise and relief that flashed back at him.
This was it. This was the opportunity he’d been waiting for all day.
He supposed he could ask if th
ey could talk somewhere privately, but he was afraid that if he gave her the opportunity, she might take off. And he needed to say this. Now.
“Jack, I—”
“Wait.” He had to get this out before he lost the words he wanted to say and somehow make everything worse. “Please let me go first.”
She nodded, her eyes and expression inscrutable again.
“Daisy. First, let me say that I’m sorry. I’m sorry I led you to believe that the way I feel for you is anything less than real. I’m also sorry that I went over your head, time and again, and made decisions for you that I should have talked to you about first. I thought I was helping you. Making things easy so that you’d never have a reason to leave me. And in doing so, I might have ended up losing you all the same.”
He took a breath, taking a moment to loosen his tie and the tightness around his neck, before he could continue. “When Lara got sick, she tried so hard to put on a brave face for everyone. I wanted to do anything and everything that was in my power to help her through it, but she refused. She insisted she would be fine, that she was strong and could do it all herself. At the time, you have to remember, I was recently elected to the city council and my schedule was so stretched that I thought the only solution would be to resign. But again, she said no.”
He ran a hand over his face, hating to relive all of this, remembering the pain. But it was time he let it go. Let his guilt go for things that maybe weren’t in his control after all. And embrace what was in front of him. “I told myself all this time that I should never have listened to her. That I should have been at her side no matter what she said. And the fact that I didn’t has left me wracked with guilt every day since. That maybe if I had, she would still be here. Which I think is why I kept pushing you, even when you asked me to stop. I had to do everything in my power to give you what I didn’t give Lara.
“It’s only now, after losing you that I can see that I don’t have to do everything. That it’s okay to just be a strong but silent force who’s there to provide support in whatever way I can. That Lara was happy to see me still out there, making a difference and serving the public during the day, while still coming home to hold her hand at night and tuck our daughter into bed. I didn’t abandon her. And letting you choose what I can help you with and what I can let you do yourself isn’t abandoning you.”
He took another step forward, encouraged by the tears shining in her eyes, the fact she was still there, listening to him. He was aware that the people around him were oddly quiet and motionless, but he didn’t dare look away from Daisy. Not until he was done.
“I promise that if you want me to be hands off and let you do things for yourself, I’ll work very hard to honor your wishes. But I hope you won’t. I hope you’ll let me help you any way I can, not because I feel obligated to help…but because I want to help.” He reached out, taking Daisy’s cold hand in his. “I’m sorry if I gave you the impression that I was proposing to you the other night because of the campaign. I promise you, that as much as I might want to be elected governor of this state, I would walk away from the campaign today if I thought that I would lose you otherwise. None of that means anything if you aren’t there with me every step of the way. And not just you, but Lily, Jenna, Natalie, and Paul, too. We’re a family now. And we are going to have to get used to doing everything together. Well, most things together. The things that count.”
He ran his thumb over the top of her hand. “I know you think it’s too soon and that I already told you all the reasons it’s not before. But it bears repeating. The moment I saw you I knew you were special. I knew in those days that followed that that glimmer I saw between us on that first night was the real thing. I don’t need more time to know that you’re the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. But I understand that right now, you need time. Time to get used to the idea of us. And when you are ready—in a month, a year, five years, twenty, however long—just know”—he dug into his pocket and pulled out the ring—“that this will be ready to go back on your finger. When you’re ready.”
There were sighs around him, not to mention several flashes as the guests near them snapped pics.
But it wasn’t the crowd’s opinion that mattered right now. It was the woman staring back at him who was the only person he wanted to hear from.
…
Daisy took her gaze away from Jack and looked down at the ring that she’d felt was hers since the moment she saw it. Just as Jack was hers and she was Jack’s.
Her heart was full from all the wonderful things he’d told her as well as the heartbreaking ones. Such as the guilt he’s carried for not feeling he was there enough for his wife. Because knowing this man as well as she did, she knew there was no way that Lara wouldn’t have seen what she saw now.
A man full of love, of hope, and a strong sense of doing the right thing. A man who would give her the moon if she let him.
She blinked back more tears. “I don’t need more time. I’m not afraid anymore, because I know what’s in your heart. And mine. And there’s nothing that would make me prouder or happier than becoming your wife, Jack Harrison. I don’t know what I did to ever deserve someone as kind and loving and patient as you, but I promise I won’t take you for granted. I want you to be my partner. I want to be able to work together to reach the goals we’ve set out for ourselves as individuals, as a couple, or as a family. I know we each could do what we had to by ourselves if we needed to. But I realize now that that’s the beauty of being in a relationship where we’re also partners. We no longer have to.”