No survivors at all.
None.
Sand takes on an unusual texture when stained with blood, and I didn’t think I’d ever be able to look at it the same again. We had spent a long time in the war zone, where explosions and the crumbling buildings around us were so common it became part of day-to-day life. But this silence was something else. An occasional shuffle as the wind shifted something, the crunch of shrapnel and debris under our boots.
But otherwise, silence.
Maybe this was overkill. Maybe it would’ve been better to send us in first or use snipers to take out the threats. Those who viewed these zones only through a computer screen from a desk, they didn’t want to take the chance that anyone would slip away again, and we’d have to spend more months and lose more lives trying to find them once more.
“There were children here.”
My voice was a monotone, unrecognizable even to me.
Vance slapped me on the shoulder as he passed, the strap from my weapon digging uncomfortably into my skin.
“Collateral damage, Ilsa. All part of the game… unfortunately.”
Collateral damage.
Part of the game.
Except this wasn’t a fucking game.
Was this the moment that would break me? Or was it a slow build of all the incredibly fucked-up things I had witnessed, and even worse, been a part of, finally getting the better of me? People weren’t meant to take this. We’re not designed to simply keep pulling the trigger without it eventually eating into our minds and souls.
This, I realized, would be my last deployment.
I didn’t know what I was going to do, but I knew this wasn’t it.
Where would I go? I didn’t know anything else. This was all I wanted to do.
But I came to protect innocent people, not harm them.
“Down! Down! Down!”
I responded too slow, too caught up in emotions I should’ve had a better control on.
The explosion was so loud it left me with nothing but a high-pitched ringing in my ears, so deep it felt like it was within my brain and now embedded in my mind.
Maybe it was.
My vision was obscured by a blinding white light.
Pain, so much fucking pain.
And then nothing.