“Yeah, you do. I need you to. I need to understand what it is that’s upsetting you.”
“I’m fine.”
“Sugar, you’re a mess,” he murmured softly.
She threw up the only defense she had. Her anger. “Who are you to tell me that? Who are you to tell me anything?”
“Shannon-” His voice was calm, soothing. “At first I thought this was about this boyfriend you’re hiding from, but it’s not, is it?” When she didn’t respond he continued, his voice soft, tender almost. “Shannon, I remember that day, years ago. I haven’t forgotten. The first time I laid eyes on you, you were handcuffed in the back of a panel van. Is that what the other day was about…the van? Is that why it upset you so?”
She felt stricken, terrified on the inside of bringing it out in the open. “You’re so full of questions, aren’t you?” she snapped nastily and watched as Crash let her attitude roll right off him.
“Lucky for you, I have nothing to do tonight but get answers from you.”
She shook her head, pulling free of his hold and backing up. “I don’t need you analyzing me.”
Crash let out a deep breath. “I see what you’re doing, Shannon. You’re putting up walls with the attitude.” He shook his head. “You ever trust me enough to let me in, I swear I’ll never hurt you.”
She stared at him with big, liquid eyes, wanting to believe him, afraid she couldn’t.
“Sweetheart, you need to talk about it. All of it. The van. The Taser. The fear that’s got you freezing up with panic attacks and waking up with nightmares.” He hesitated, and then asked, “It’s Ling, isn’t it?”
When she didn’t reply, because she couldn’t, because her throat had closed up, he kept going, his voice deep, low, soothing.
“Come here, darlin’. Tell me. Say it. Whisper it, if that’s all you’ve got. Just start.” He held his arms out. “I’ll hold you, baby.”
She stared at him, her eyes dropping to the arms he held out to her, and suddenly all she wanted was to have them wrapped around her. She moved to him, one step, another, and then she felt those strong arms close around her, pulling her flush against him, holding her tight.
“Baby,” he whispered in her ear, brushing the hair back. “Tell me about the night he took you.”
She sobbed.
“There’s nothing you can’t say to me. You know that, don’t you?”
She nodded, her head tucked under his chin. “I…I was in college back then.”
He rubbed her back. “You were young.”
“I still should have known. I should have been more careful.”
“What happened?” he whispered against her head.
“I was on campus, leaving the library. It was late. I was walking across the parking lot to my car. The van was there. It was parked next to my car. I…I really didn’t pay any attention to it. I should have.”
“You couldn’t have known.” He continued to stroke her back.
She was pressed up against his
strong chest, her arms wound round his waist. She held tight.
“What happened next?”
“I was digging in my purse for my keys.” She shook her head. “I should have had them out. I should have been paying attention to my surroundings.”
“Don’t blame yourself, Shannon. Maybe there were things you could have done differently, but it wasn’t your fault you were attacked. Don’t put that on yourself.”
She nodded, her head resting against his chest.
He rubbed her back, his other hand cradling her head to him. “Tell me the rest.”