“YOU! Not another bloody step!” he roared as he stomped into the kitchen.
Eep.
I turned around to see the Finger of Doom wagging in my face.
“What did I tell you?! What did I tell you I’d do if you fucked with this band?!”
“…you’d bury me,” I said, actually terrified he was about to make good on his promise.
“That I did, and I have half a mind to do it right now!”
Ryan walked into the room. “Then I guess you’re going to have to dispose of two bodies, seeing as I was the one who seduced
her.
”
It was entirely unintentional, but both Miles and I looked at him at the exact same instant like
Yeah, RIGHT.
Ryan looked hurt – but only at
my
expression. “Hey…”
I winced and smiled apologetically. “I just… I wouldn’t use the word ‘seduced.’”
“I
did
save you from a cougar.”
“Yes, and it was very heroic, but that just
happened
. You didn’t exactly plan that.”
“Come on, work with me here,” he smiled, his sense of humor returning.
Miles squinted. “You saved her from a
what?”
“A mountain lion.”
“Oh… I was wonderin’ why you’d need to save her from a middle-aged slag…”
I frowned. “‘Slag’ better not mean what I think it means.”
“I was talking about someone
else,
not
you.
Although, if the shoe fits – ”
“Miles? DON’T,” Ryan ordered.
Miraculously, the band manager complied – although he really just turned his ire away from me and towards his bassist. “It’s enough I have two idjits and a barmy pothead in the band, I didn’t need another fuckin’ problem!” he yelled as he paced back and forth, ranting and raving.
As Miles continued to blow off steam, I whispered to Ryan, “How do all these people manage to get into your gated community?”
“They have a standing pass to come in whenever they want.”
“You might want to rethink that.”
“Believe me, I am.”
Seeing that we weren’t paying attention to his tirade made him even angrier, and he got right up in Ryan’s face. Well, actually, the Finger of Doom got right up in Ryan’s face, since Miles was almost a foot and a half shorter. It was like a Chihuahua barking at a Great Dane.
“You’re supposed to be the responsible one!” Miles shouted.
“I
am
the responsible one.”
“Only because the others are complete nutters! I’d expect this bullshit out of HIM, but YOU?!”
Suddenly Miles calmed down. The expression on his face changed from enraged to troubled.
“Well,” he said hesitantly, “I’d’ve expected it out of him
before,
but
now
…”
Ryan frowned. “‘Now’ what?”
“…he’s different.”
“Different how?”
“Why don’t you see for yourself? He’s out in the car. I can go and get him.”
My stomach flip-flopped. “He’s outside
now?”
“Was I unclear?
Yes,
now,” Miles said sarcastically.
“I understood you fine,” I snapped. “It’s just…”
I stopped and floundered helplessly in silence.
“Just what?”
“The old Derek wouldn’t have waited for anybody,” Ryan spoke for me. “He would have burst in here like a bull in a china shop.”
Ryan had nailed it. That was it exactly.
“That’s what I’m tryin’ to tell you – it’s not the old him anymore,” Miles said.
We all stood around looking at each other. Besides all the turmoil inside me at the prospect of seeing him walk through the door, I had the eerie feeling that maybe the man I had once fallen in love with didn’t exist anymore. That maybe all that remained was a shell of his former self. What would that be like, to see the ghost of someone who hadn’t died yet?
“Well, do you want me to go get him or not?” Miles asked impatiently.
Ryan and I glanced at each other. I struggled mightily not to let my emotions show on my face.
After a couple of seconds, I nodded.
Ryan turned back to Miles and shrugged. “Sure. Might as well go ahead and get this over with.”
“Get
what
over with?”
“Whatever’s about to happen,” Ryan said darkly.
“If anything ‘happens,’ it’s your own bloody fault.”
“I’m well aware of that. Go get him.”
Miles scowled and tromped off towards the front door.
My internal panic was off the scale. Not only was I about to see Derek again – or what remained of him… not only was I going to have to deal with all the feelings that I thought were dead, but had inconveniently come back to life… but I might just witness the end of the world’s biggest rock band.
And it would be all my fault.
Ryan eyed me carefully. “Are you alright?”
“I… no, I’m not. What if you guys break up?”