Miles stuck around long enough to be sure that no fights were going to break out. Once he was convinced, he took his leave.
“You lot behave,” he admonished the boys. “We start tomorrow at the studio at noon.”
“No problem,” Derek said, and took a sip of his sparkling water.
“See you there,” Ryan agreed.
Miles took one last look at me, harrumphed, and then saw himself out.
“How’s Riley and Killian?” Derek asked. “I haven’t talked to them yet.”
“Um… they’re okay,” Ryan said.
“That didn’t sound convincing.”
Ryan and I exchanged looks.
“You guys have got to quit doing that, you’re freaking me out,” Derek joked. “Like there’s some conspiracy everybody knows about except me.”
Ryan hesitated. “It’s just…”
“Everybody thought the band was going to break up,” I blurted out.
Derek looked at me and nodded serenely. “Because of you and me.”
My heart caught in my throat. “Yeah.”
“Well, we’re not breaking up. In fact, I should text them and tell them to stop worrying,” Derek said as he dug a cell phone out of his pocket.
“You have a cell phone now?”
“Yeah, I kind of ‘borrowed’ one from one of the roadies when I was in my obsessive phase with you,” he grinned. “Sorry about that.”
My heart jumped again. He didn’t notice, though; he was too busy scrolling through his contacts and tapping on the iPhone.
“Anyway, I got used to it… and Miles gave me one with everybody’s numbers in it once I got out. I, uh… I was too nervous to call anybody, though.”
“You were nervous?” I asked, shocked.
“Yeah,” he said, like he couldn’t understand why I was so surprised. “I was a real asshole to a lot of people. I wasn’t too sure how they were going to react once I got out.”
Ryan shifted uncomfortably. “Derek, I… um… I need to tell you something.”
Derek looked up from the phone. “Okay.”
“Kaitlyn and I weren’t together in South Dakota when we saw you last… but… since then… we are now. Together, I mean.”
It was kind of like stating
The sky is blue,
but I suppose it needed to be said.
As soon as Ryan put it out there, though, my heart started to pound in my chest.
I saw a brief flash of something on Derek’s face – anger? Hurt? – but then he returned to his zen serenity.
“I know,” he said simply.
“…you do?”
“Yeah. Well, I mean, I didn’t believe you back at your ranch. That’s the whole reason I flipped out in LA. I did a lot of work dealing with it in rehab. And then Miles told me you guys were still together the second I got out.” Derek chuckled. “He said that if I was going to lose it, he wanted me to do it then so they could put me right back inside.”
“We weren’t together when you saw us,” Ryan said. “I swear we weren’t.”
Derek nodded. “I believe you.”
“But… we are now.”
“Yeah, I got that,” Derek said with a bit of dark humor.
“And… you’re okay with it?”
“I wouldn’t say I’m
okay
with it. But like I said, I dealt with all that stuff in rehab. I’m…”
He paused and blew out a hard breath.
“Okay, if I’m totally going to be honest, then… you hurt me. Both of you.” He looked at me. “Kaitlyn,
you
I can totally understand. I cheated on you, and I’m so sorry for that. If I could take back just one thing in my entire life, I would take that back. It was only that one time, I swear, but that doesn’t matter. It was one time too many. And the cheating wasn’t the only thing. I treated you really badly towards the end, and I hope you’ll forgive me for that, too. I’m so sorry.”