It’s a first for me.
I don’t take the time to get to know the guys I hook up with, but it’s different with Jake. Comfortable. He has this way about him, this no-pressure attitude that makes it easy to forget all the bullshit and simply exist in the moment with him. It helps salvage the rest of the date, and even though I know I won’t be going home with him tonight like I thought, I’ve had a good time.
Outside the restaurant after Jake’s paid the tab and tipped the server, he takes my hand and walks me to my car in comfortable silence. Rather than drag it out, I say goodnight and leave him with a chaste kiss on his cheek and a promise to text him once I’m home safely. It’s a far cry from how I thought the night would end, but somehow… it’s better.
The drive home takes no time at all. As promised, I fire off a text to let him know I’m home before I get out of the car. The house is quiet when I go inside, so I’m surprised to find Riley standing alone in the dimly lit kitchen, leaning against the counter with a glass of whiskey in her hand.
“Didn’t expect you home so early,” she whispers without looking my way.
“Long story,” I breathe out with a sigh. “Why are you whispering?”
Moving closer, I notice the crease in her brow. With the hand holding the glass, she gestures toward the living room before taking a drink. Following her line of sight, I squint, barely able to make out Hope’s form slumped in the recliner in the dark living room.
“She’s not in a good place,” she tells me, eyes never leaving Hope.
“I’m worried about her,” I admit.
“Penny said she hasn’t moved all day.” She swirls the whiskey in the glass, sighing before drinking down the rest. “She hasn’t said a word, won’t even acknowledge Mercy. She just sits there, staring out the window with that cold, dead look in her eyes.”
My heart clenches in my chest.
Learning what happened to Hope might help us understand her struggles, but it’s not some magical fix for everything that’s wrong. Knowing why she is how she is and knowing how to help her are two different things. We’d give anything to make things better for Hope, but she’s content to ignore the world and let her demons devour her, turning her into a shadow of herself.
“I don’t know how to help her, Riley,” I painfully admit.
“You can’t.”
I know she’s right, but it doesn’t hurt any less.
Unless Hope decides to fight for herself, there’s nothing we can do but stand by and watch as her traumatic past destroys her over and over again. It’s heartbreaking and devastating to witness, but we’ll find a way to deal with it.
“We’ll get through this,” Riley says, but I don’t know if she’s trying to convince me or herself.
The truth is… we don’t have a choice.
“For Mercy.”
It’s all for her.
No matter what happens with Hope, Mercy will be taken care of. She’s the center of our universe, and though it’s doubtful she’ll make it through this unscathed, we’ll do everything in our power to minimize the damage.
Finally, Riley tears her gaze from Hope and looks at me, eyes burning with determination.
“For Mercy.”