I glance over to her, the blush on her cheeks telling me the question isn’t so innocent.
“You’ll have to be more specific, love,” I tease, “Do you mean in my spare time or sexually?”
“Uh,” she chokes, “The second one.”
I chuckle, reveling in that flush on her cheeks and neck, “You want to know what gets me off, Eleanor, other than your perfect pussy?”
“Oh God!” She covers her face in her hands, hiding that blush from me.
“Come on, Eleanor, is that what you want?”
“Yes!” She mumbles into her hands.
“Look at me,” I say to her, the car rolling through the traffic.
She peeks through her fingers and glares at me.
“There are a few things,” I reach across, my hand wrapping around her thigh, squeezing her flesh. She blows out a heavy breath, “Everything about you turns me on. Your innocence. Your fear. Your blush and arousal.”
She moves her hand now, dropping it to her lap, close to mine. I keep one eye on the road, but mostly I’m paying attention to her. I move my pinky finger, brushing it up against her hand, “but there are other things. I made Crimson as a release, to give and receive. A safe place to explore your desires with people with similar interests. When I came into this life, I had a lot of anger and no way to get it out without bloodshed, and I found sex to be the safest way to ease that pressure.”
I risk a glance at her face, expecting some judgement but finding her expression open, willing to listen and understand.
I turn back to the road and take a right off the main street, going the longer way home but with less traffic. We drive by office buildings and shops, cafés and restaurants, people milling about even with the temperature hovering around freezing.
“I’ve slept with a lot of people, Eleanor, I’ve done things that most people would have never even heard of, but most of all, I found I liked to watch.”
“Watch?”
I smirk, “I like to watch people fuck, love, I like to see their pleasure, their release while I get my own.”
“Like porn?”
I chuckle, “Porn isn’t real. It’s good for a quick orgasm but nothing lasting, I want real, lasting pleasure, a release to keep me satiated and seeing it in front of me gives me that.”
“Would you watch me?”
My head snaps towards her, forgetting I’m driving, forgetting I’m going fast enough to do damage to both of us and anyone in our paths.
“Watch you how?”
She looks out the window and then back at me, steeling her shoulders, “Get pleasure.”
“By another man?”
The thought was both intoxicating and enough fuel to have me seeing red. It would be an experience, to see her climb that peak, but seeing it happen because of another man would be a test, I’m sure.
She shrugs, “Maybe, or maybe by myself? Both? I don’t know.”
“I would watch you.” I decide. “However way it came.”
She nods and goes back to looking out the window.
“What about you?”
“I don’t know what I like, I’ve never done any of this. The sex with you is different to the sex I’ve had with anyone else.”
I grin.
She rolls her eyes.
“What about your desires? What do you want to try if given the chance?”
She thinks for a long minute as I take another corner, close to her apartment now.
“I’ve never…” she hesitates, “I’ve only done basic things, foreplay and sex, I found it more an inconvenience than anything else.”
“Is that right? Should we change that then?”
She laughs, “Not now, not anymore but because of that, I’ve never thought much on it. Crimson scared me.”
“Why?”
“Because I liked it.”
She chews her lip, brows pulled low.
“You won’t be judged by me, Eleanor.”
She looks over at me, searches my face and sighs, “I liked being touched in front of people, I liked watching. I liked it when you chased me and caught me. I liked the fear and how it made me feel.”
I nod. I knew this already, but she needed to figure it out herself. “What else?”
“That day, at Crimson, we were in front of a room, there were, uh, three people.”
I suck my tongue on my teeth, suppressing my smile, “You want to try it.”
It’s not a question but even so, it’s confirmed by her silence. I pull up to her apartment and kill the engine. Neither of us move to get out of the car.
“We have time,” I tell her, “We can try it when you’re ready.”
She blows out a breath, doesn’t say a word and gets out the car.