“Do you think that’s why they’re giving you so much trouble?”
“It’s why I’m so mad at myself. I should’ve been the one to leave Pedro. Because I was clinging to something that didn’t work either. It’s a slap in the face for it to be the other way around. Anyway, I don’t want to talk about Pedro anymore. There’s a new wolf in my life. Let’s talk about Logan.”
That declaration earned me one of Bibi’s megawatt grins. “Can we talk about Cindy, too? Because she’s pretty special, and I don’t think you’ve been giving her enough attention lately.”
I’d been holding back the tears all night, but Bibi finally got me. I’d dabbed them because I’d wanted my makeup to last long enough that I could see what I looked like in my bathroom mirror in my little cabin after such an incredible day. It would help me believe this was really my life now. “I haven’t.”
“We’ll change that. I won’t keep you once we get back to your house, because it’s been a long day for all of us and we need time to process what’s happened. What would you like to happen next? The sky’s the limit, Cindy. I have some ideas, but I want to hear what you have to say, because this is about you.”
“A babysitter, definitely. But I need to be part of that process.”
“If someone else is taking care of the littles, that means you have time to do things besides go on dates. Anything you’ve been wanting to do?”
The mere suggestion was decadent. “Can I think about that?”
“Of course. Don’t be shy. When I told you this was a total life makeover, I meant it.” Bibi slid the van door open. “Get some rest tonight. The makeover starts in the morning.”
Today had been totally surreal, and it didn’t stop when I walked into my house and found Wendy half-awake under an ancient afghan on my couch.
“Thank you so much for watching the kids.” I collapsed beside her and pulled a stuffed animal out from underneath me. “I owe you big. Of course, I have no money, and my cooking is mostly limited to the instructions on the back of the package, so what other payments do you take?”
“Just promise me you’ll be my support system when it’s my episode and I choose the wrong shifter. Again. My family is tired of hearing about it and insists I should find a nice human and stop making a fool out of myself. That may or may not be a direct quote, depending on how much credence you give my Aunt Diane after she’s taken a deep dive into a box of chardonnay.”
“Bibi and Marissa won’t give you any bad choices.”
Wendy gave me a look.
“What?”
“You don’t think you got set up? Think about it, Cin. Pedro’s supposedly been lost deep in the forest on some wolfly mission, but he knew the exact moment to appear on stage? That’s awfully good timing.”
“Some of the wolves on the security crew are Green Mountain pack. He probably had a head’s up.”
“Explainable, but far from cool. Also, I have some new questions about Logan.”
I sighed. “Wendy, why are you doing this? I had a really great time with him. I’m happy. It’s been a while since I can say that.”
She handed me her tablet. The knot in my stomach told me I knew what it was going to say before I even looked at the screen.
Exclusive! Why Logan Mathis left scripted TV for reality TV....and why this role will make or break his career.
They even had pictures of us out on the deck, toasting each other before our first sip of champagne. How did they get those without us noticing? I’d been so lost in this wolf I didn’t even see them.
Or care, to be honest. My wolf rumbled inside of me, insisting that whatever this article said didn’t matter. It would be based on what they overheard. Not who he really was.
Mathis confessed his inability to go full wolf, the trait on which he’s built his legendary career. Is he using this appearance on The Mating Game to stage his comeback as a human leading man? Or is the whole thing an elaborate hoax to save the sagging ratings on The Wolf’s Moon?
“No.” Arguing with the tablet wouldn’t work. Neither would throwing it against the wall to shatter the claim. Nothing I could do would shield Logan from this type of scrutiny. There were already thousands of comments. I could only imagine what the forums looked like.
Wendy took the tablet back from me. “For what it’s worth, I like Logan.”
“They aren’t right about him.”
“What if they are?”
“What do I do? The cameras will be following us everywhere until we have our mating ceremony—or I say he’s not my mate.” My heart hurt at the thought. “But I really think he is.”
Wendy had the same look on her face that she’d worn all those nights I’d told her about Pedro. When I’d realized how long I’d put up with his nonsense, and it was right in front of my face all along.
“Okay. Say this article is true, not that I think a reporter knows Logan Mathis better than I do just because they were eavesdropping on our private conversation.” It wasn’t private, since Bjorn recorded every bit of it, and Wendy’s expression might as well have been carved into the side of Green Mountain because nothing I’d say would change her mind. “What should I do? Back out of the show with my tail tucked between my legs and admit that I got duped? If I do, that could spell disaster for The Mating Game. That could mean you don’t get your episode.”
As much as Wendy had a flair for the dramatic, and she’d had a streak of bad luck with shifters that ran longer than any gossip column, she wanted a mate. Not a husband, a mate. Since we’d been introduced by Bibi, we’d spent several evenings on this couch, eating ice cream straight from the container, watching sappy romance movies while talking about how things would be different this time.
“Hell no. You’re not backing out of this. Why should you? You’re not the one trying to revive your acting career through a dating show.”
But I was hoping The Mating Game could perform some much-needed CPR on my life overall, so as much as she was suggesting a divide between my motives and Logans, we weren’t that different.
Wendy leaned forward. “If he can’t shift, how can he claim you?”
My mouth dropped. “I didn’t even think of that.” I racked my brain for possibilities and the stupid mark on my shoulder throbbed. Pedro had been human when he claimed me. It was all ceremony, but no wolf would ever try to lay claim on a marked she-wolf. Unless of course, her mate had run off and left her with three kids... But if Logan couldn’t mark me, claim me, the Green Mountain pack would never accept him as mine.
I had to stop worrying about what my pack thought about my life. But this was a big concern.
“Maybe we can figure out why Logan can’t shift. You have a background in that sort of stuff, right?”
“Actually, my work was in archeology.” She peered into the corners. “Is this place bugged? Are they recording you all the time?”
I let out a nervous laugh. “No. What’s wrong?”
“In college, I minored in shifter history. I was doing work on why shifters are no longer immortal, but some of the packs in the area didn’t like me getting too close to their secrets. They threatened me away from it. That’s why I work in real estate now.”
“So maybe you can tell me what to look for, and I can do the research?”
The look on her face said she wasn’t convinced.
“I’m a shifter. We all deserve to know our history.” The Colorado Ranch pack had been working on beefing up the shifter section of their library, and it sounded like Wendy might know some things they didn’t.
“I can do some research on the down low,” she finally said. “But don’t tell anyone. Not even Bibi, okay?”
“My lips are sealed. Seriously, let me know what I can do to help. I haven’t studied much of anything since high school, but I’d love to do something meaningful for my pack. For Logan.” Bibi had asked me what I wanted to do...and the answer was: I wanted to make this pack better.
I didn’t want to leave. Leaving was for cowards.
Just ask my ex. He could give a college-level class on the subject.
“Things could get dangerous if we dig too deep, and we might find things we don’t like about Logan,” Wendy warned.
“He’s my mate. I don’t expect him to be perfect.”
Wendy raised a brow. “You’ve already decided he’s your mate?”
“Wait until you see the footage from tonight.”
“Mama.” Carter came around the corner with bedhead hair, wearing his adorable airplane pajamas. He climbed onto the couch and cuddled against me. The boys had trouble sleeping through the night since Pedro left. I expected his brother to join us at any moment.
They’d probably put up a brave front for their auntie. Maybe it was too soon to bring in a babysitter they didn’t know.
They’ll move on when they see you living your life to the fullest, my she-wolf insisted. Right now, you’re all in mourning, at a standstill. Show them how to move forward...
I kissed the top of his warm little head. I loved the way he smelled like wolf. “Did you have a bad dream?”
He nodded. “I was scared you wouldn’t come home. That that wolf would take you—"
“Shhh.” I hugged him tight, mostly to keep my own heart from breaking. “I’ll never leave you.”
He looked at me, those dark eyes still wide and full of horror from the dream that would keep me up all night. “But you’d come back and visit sometimes, too, right?”
“I’m not leaving.” I emphasized each word. “I went out with Logan tonight, and when I go out with him again, Auntie Wendy or someone else will come and have fun with you guys. But I’ll always come back to you. Wait a minute.” I looked at Wendy to see if she’d picked up on what he’d said. “Has Dad come to see you?”
Another nod.
What?
“He comes sometimes at night. When we’re in bed. But he doesn’t stay long.”
A chill went down my spine. Pedro had slipped back in the house, more than once, and I had no fucking idea?!
“What does he say to you?”
“That we’ve been good, and when we’re ready, he’ll bring us to run in the forest with him.”