One for the Money

Their secrets need to be protected.

“I came to see if Finn is at home. Or if he’s busy.”

“Please come in,” he says, holding the door open. “I’ll take you to him.”

I remain on the expansive front patio, even though I’m being strange. “You know what? He might be busy. I didn’t call ahead. Maybe you could check before I just—”

“Eva?” Finn comes down one of two large staircases, looking so handsome it stops my heart. His hair is ruffled. He wears a dark blue sweater and slacks that’s casual for a man usually in suits. He looks tired, but that only adds to his realness.

This is a flesh-and-blood man. Not a dream.

“I’m sorry,” I say, flustered. “It’s just that I—”

He reaches me, concern in his expression. “Is everything okay?”

I look down and realize that I’m still wearing a ruffled lavender dress. I bought it specifically for Haley’s baby shower. Which feels like a million years ago. I packed Leo into the ambulance, making the EMTs swear not to stab him no matter how intensely he acted. Then I piled into an SUV with my sisters to go to the hospital.

It took a few hours for them to run every test in existence.

I’m pretty sure Leo thought of a few more just to drive them insane.

She fainted, the doctors said. Relatively normal. At least that’s what they tried to tell us. Haley is officially on bed-rest, which means she really is trapped in that bedroom. Though the doctors aren’t particularly worried, she can’t walk around if she might faint.

The fall could hurt her.

Leo didn’t accept the explanation of relatively normal. He then insisted the head of Obstetrics for the entire hospital group fly to New York City. Emerson came to pick up Daphne. Lucian took Elaine away. Sophia and Lizzy were each driven home.

I remained until the end, escorting them back home, smoothing over Leo’s sharp words with the hospital staff and driver. I kept him from losing it completely when we arrived at the house and his deepest fears overwhelmed him. Hospitals. Pain. Death. Haley was tucked into bed, Leo in a chair beside her, his eyes rimmed red, his expression grim as he stared at his wife, by the time I left.

Somehow I didn’t drive back to my loft.

I ended up here.

The fear of that moment, of watching Haley sink into a faint, of not knowing how she or the baby would be, comes to me in a rush. I had to be strong for Leo, for my family. That’s over now. The facade drops. There’s room for my emotions with Finn. I can be vulnerable here. I can be safe here. It comes upon me all at once. I break into uncontrollable, messy sobs.

Strong arms surround me. I recognize them as Finn’s.

I have the strange thought that I would always recognize them, because of how safe he makes me feel. Except always doesn’t last forever. Which makes me cry harder.

He half-carries me across the stone and down a few steps. I’m aware of crossing an open space. A few more stairs, and then Finn sits.

I’m wrapped in his lap, being held, his lips pressing in an unending kiss against my temple. I let all of my fear come out in those cries—not only for my niece and Haley and Leo, but for my entire family. For everyone I care about, when it feels like they’re always on the brink of breaking. Like if I look away, if I blink, they’ll come undone.

I’m the one coming undone.

Slowly the sobs taper off, leaving only shudders.

We’re still outside. I can smell the salt scent of the water. The Hughes estate backs up to Stony Cove beach, where the earth comes together. Mountain and ocean and land interlace their fingers. It gives us privacy. It feels like we’re in our own world.

“Tell me what happened,” he murmurs.

“Nothing,” I say, my voice thick. “She’s okay. Haley’s okay. The baby is okay.” The words are more than conversation. They’re a prayer.

“Okay,” he says, his voice still calm and soothing. “That’s good.”

I let out a deep breath. “She collapsed at the baby shower. Something about how the hormones released in the body during pregnancy relax the blood vessels. Low blood pressure means less oxygen to the brain. So she fainted.”

He rubs my back in calming circles. “Did she get hurt?”

“I caught her. She was dead weight in my arms. I had her on the couch before Leo got to me.” A soft laugh. “I think he broke the light and sound barrier doing it. Apparently the biggest thing to worry about is being hurt from the fall, so they put her on bed-rest.”

“I’m sorry. Can I do anything to help?”

I lean my head against him, and he tucks me under his neck. “You always see me at my worst. Things going wrong. Breaking down. Crying.”