“Say it,” I tell him when he trails off, his gaze flitting to the desk.
“It’s going to be expensive, cousin. Very expensive.”
“I don’t care,” I snarl. “I won’t let a single innocent die. If one of our men dies in a war, it’d be a terrible thing. I’d hate myself for it. But everybody here understands what game they’re playing. What we can't have is a wife, a mother, a kid, getting hurt…we can’t have that.”
Patton nods. “And you’re okay using your personal funds?”
“I told you I was,” I snap. “Is there a problem?”
He shakes his head. “No, I’ve already moved them. For the families staying in the city, we’ve got top-of-the-line security. These men have served overseas. They’re quiet and discreet. And they know the circumstances. They’ll do their job well.”
Patton isn’t lying about the cost. Hundreds of thousands – and then pretty soon millions – are going to vanish from my bank account. But it’s worth it to make sure nobody dies because of my decision.
Not that we can make sure.
We can only mitigate the risk.
“It’s a lot,” Patton says quietly, wringing his hands.
I walk over to the window with a sigh, looking out at the garden. Security lights shine brightly onto the surrounding fields, making it impossible for anybody to sneak up on us.
“I feel like there’s something you want to say,” I tell him.
“What’s happening with Lena, cousin?” he says after a pause.
“What do you mean?”
“Have you been seeing her – before this, I mean? Are you two…together? There has to be more going on here. I’ve never known you to act this way for anybody. Going in there alone….” He pauses, tone lowering. “You could’ve been killed.”
“I know,” I say gruffly.
“So why?”
I turn, studying Patton. He’s my oldest friend, my cousin, family, and he’s never led me astray.
But will he understand this?
“I don’t know how to describe it,” I tell him. “But I couldn’t let him have her. I was ready to die in there. I’ve only ever felt that way once when I went to war with Conor’s father. If I had to give my life so Lena could be free, I would have.”
My voice is unwavering, my tone firm. Patton sits back slightly, fiddling with his glasses.
“You’re not messing around,” he mutters.
“No.” I sit heavily, running a hand through my hair. “I care about her. But we only met the other night.”
“I’m sorry, but I don’t understand.”
“We met. We kissed. We….”
I paused, unwilling to go into anything intimate about my woman. Even if Patton would never dream of pursuing somebody I had claimed, the thought alone makes me want to howl.
“We talked,” I go on. “We bonded. I guess that’s what you’d call it. I just couldn’t let him have her. It’s as simple as that.”
Patton nods. “Okay, cousin. I get it.”
There’s no way he can get it, not unless I explain.
And there’s no way I can explain with him thinking I’ve lost my mind.
Maybe I have.
But if that’s the case, I can’t think of anybody else I’d rather lose it to.
“How long do we have?” I ask.
We’re going to head into the city ourselves. We’ve got weapons, and cash stowed all over the place, but only we have the codes for any of the safes.
“You don’t have to come,” Patton says.
I grind my teeth.
I don’t want to go with him. The only thing I want is waiting for me upstairs, my Lena with her wavy hair and her gorgeously shy sassy expression and the look in her eyes when she realized I didn’t want to hurt her.
“I made this mess,” I snarl. “I’m not going to hide away as other men fix it for me.”
Patton checks his watch. “About fifteen minutes.”
I nod, making for the door. “I’ll see you outside.”
Walking down the hallway, I try to compose myself.
There’s been so much to focus on since the madness at the hotel. My heart is thundering, and my whole body is taut. Tightness, lust, destiny, and the nearness to violence all make me feel on edge.
But I know I can’t approach my woman like this.
It will probably freak her out, letting her know that she is my woman. But if I come on too strong, with all the passion scorching through me, she’ll be able to sense something.
It’s one thing to share some closeness, to get a tattoo on a wild whim….
What if I told her I wanted to have children with her? What if I told her we were destined to be together?
I pause outside her door, brushing my hands down my shirt.
“What is it, boy?” Lena says, her voice soft. There’s an underlying note to it, almost as though part of her still thinks this is a trick.
Jackson whines and paws at the door. His nails making a scritching noise.
“It’s me,” I call. “Can I come in?”