H is for Hawk (Men of ALPHAbet Mountain)

“When I was leaving, he said it was really nice to see me again and to spend time with me, and maybe we could spend time together again,” I told her. “And I just kind of blurted out that he should come with me to the wedding.”

I propped my elbows on the table and dropped my head into my hands.

“You asked him to the wedding?” she asked, her voice climbing up to a higher pitch.

“Yes,” I said, nodding. “I didn’t mean to. It just came out. And I tried to act like I was kidding, but that didn’t work. Then he said he would love to come.”

“He did?”

“Yep. So, now I have a date to my sister’s wedding, which is the upside. But that date is the man who I’ve spent my whole adult life trying to get over, which is decidedly the downside,” I said.

Wendy let out a long breath. I looked up from the project I was working on and saw her staring at the piece of tulle in her hands. She didn’t look like she was actually going anything with it. Just staring. I watched her for a few seconds, then nudged her leg with my foot under the table. She looked up.

“Hmmm? Oh. Sorry.”

“What’s wrong?” I asked. “I thought you wanted me to have a date to the wedding. I know it’s kind of weird that it’s Hawk, but he was really nice yesterday. And we both…”

“I need to tell you something,” she said.

That couldn’t be good. That was very rarely a sentence people said when it was leading into something positive. I braced myself.

“What?” I asked.

She took a breath, looking uncomfortable. “I didn’t think I would ever need to tell you this, but because you offered to help him and invited him to the wedding, it will likely come up.”

“What will come up? What are you talking about?”

I was feeling anxious, worried about what it was she needed to reveal.

“Hawk did call you the night of the prom,” she said.

The words hit me, and I blinked a few times, staring at her. I really couldn’t have just heard that. There was no way my best friend had kept something like that from me all this time.

“What?” I asked.

Wendy nodded. “The night of the prom, Hawk called you. It was late, after everything, and you were so upset. I answered the phone.”

“What did he say?”

“He didn’t really get a chance to say anything,” Wendy said. “I was so angry, and as soon as I answered, I told him off six ways from Sunday. I didn’t really give him a chance to get a word in edgewise and hung up before he could respond. I hung up on him and blocked him on your phone. Then deleted the call so you would never know.”

I was so livid I couldn’t see straight for a few seconds. I didn’t even know what to say.

“You answered my phone?” I demanded through gritted teeth. “My phone? I was devastated not knowing what happened to him, and you not only answered my phone when he called, but you took it upon yourself to yell at him? Then to block him and erase the call so it was like it never happened? And for all these years, you just let me think he had stood me up without even a word? How could you do that?”

“I’m so sorry,” Wendy said.

“I just don’t understand. How could you let me go through that? How could you let me be in so much pain and be so angry for all this time, knowing full well I didn’t have to be?”

“I’m sorry,” she said again. “But you didn’t even know what he was going to say. You don’t know why he called.”

“Neither did you!” I said, my voiced raised. “Because you wouldn’t let him talk. You don’t have any idea what he was going to say. You just decided that you were going to control the situation. You were going to make the decision that was mine to make. I really don’t understand how you could do that to me. That wasn’t your place.”

“I know. And I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. But at the time, I wasn’t thinking. I was so upset. I know that doesn’t really matter to you right now because it was happening to you, but I was. You are my best friend. I love you so much, and it was killing me to see you so hurt. I’d seen how excited you were about going with Hawk. You’d had feelings for him for so long and were so convinced he was going to be it for you. Then he didn’t show up, and I was furious.

“I wasn’t thinking clearly. When your phone rang and I saw his name on it, I just reacted. You were already in such a state, I didn’t want you to answer the phone. I didn’t want you to hear his voice or see his name or anything. I couldn’t imagine there was a single thing he could say that would make up for what he’d put you through, so I did what I did,” Wendy said.