Maybe Aaron was right about me, maybe I’m not as innocent as I’d like to believe.
But, I have a choice now. I have the chance to start again, to make my life exactly how I want it. I’m not certain I can say the same for Davina. I don’t know where she is, but Lake is right, I don’t think she’ll be living a good life.
Me, on the other hand, I have a chance to do something with myself.
Something real.
And today is the beginning of that journey.
16
“Good news, ladies,” Rhett says. “Got word that because you handed Aaron in, you’re going to be released early. As of tonight, you’re not longer prisoners. You’re free of your sentence and you’re here because you want to be here, and that’s that. The paperwork is being sent over now.”
Numb, I stare at him.
I mean, we knew we were technically free, but we’ve still had guards and supervision. This is the first time I’ve heard the word and actually felt it. Free. We’re free. No more guards, no more sensors, no more checking in. We can leave if we want to leave, or we can stay and do whatever we want.
I feel Ember’s hand curl around mine.
It has been three days since we returned from our ordeal and since then, there have been cops, and questions, and a lot of things going on. I don’t know exactly what Rhett did when they got back, but he has assured me it will not come back and touch us. He promised we’re safe and we walk out of here, it’ll never bother us again.
I believe him.
I trust them.
What I didn’t know is that we were going to be released early. We still have another three or so weeks to go of the retreat and in that time, I figured we’d be fully guarded but now, oh now, we can do whatever the hell we want.
For a good portion of my adult life, I have been behind bars. I haven’t had the chance to go out and discover who I really am. Now is that chance, we’re finally able to see the world for whatever the hell we want it to be. Nothing could feel better than this moment. Nothing.
I turn to face Lake, but when I do I see he’s gone.
Frowning, I see him walking off into the paddock, picking up a rope as he goes and acting like he’s going off to work. Is he not happy for me? This moment, it’s huge and I don’t understand why he’s storming off as if he could care less what is happening to me. It makes no sense, the last three days we have barely spent ten minutes away from each other. It has been utter bliss.
“Give me a second,” I say to Ember and Fallon, and then I turn and jog after Lake.
“Hey,” I call.
He stops and turns towards me, his mouth in a tight line.
“What’s up?”
“You’re not happy for me?”
“I’m workin’, Willa.”
“Lake,” I say, my voice dipping low. “What is going on?”
He exhales, looking away from me. “The thing is...I like you. A fuckin’ lot.”
My brows go up, because that wasn’t the answer I was expecting, though now he has said it out loud, it makes a good deal of sense why he’s acting the way he is.
“I like you, too,” I answer, reaching for him.
“You’re goin’ to leave. You’ve been tellin’ me since you got here how you can’t wait to get out there and never look back. Thought I had more time before that happened.”
I don’t know what to make of his confession.
I’ve been feeling the same things, of course, but we hadn’t mentioned it to one another and so I automatically assumed that we weren’t going to. I figured if he had wanted something to come of this, he would have said so. To be fair, I could have spoken up, too.
“I do have to go out there, Lake, but not because I don’t want to be here with you but because I have things I want to do with my life. Mostly, I want to find Davina. I need to see her, to close that door. After that, I have no idea what I want to do.”
“You’ll find something, I’m sure,” he mutters, turning and walking off again.
“Lake, for crying out loud, stop acting like an overgrown baby and say what you want to say,” I bellow after him.
He stops and turns. “I don’t want you to fuckin’ go, Willa. You happy? Does that change anything? No, it doesn’t. I’ve got to fuckin’ work.”
He disappears into the paddock, and I watch him go, exhaling.
Well.
This is just grand.
“He’s upset.”
I turn and see Dante standing beside me, horse on a lead, ready to go and help Lake work.
“Yeah, he is.”
“Can I offer you a word of advice? Just from someone who has seen a lot in this world, and been around the block a few times?”